


Polarize

by underumbrage



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Christmas Fluff, M/M, Minor Character Death, Mistletoe, Spider!AU, Spoilers, Threats of Violence, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-24
Updated: 2015-12-24
Packaged: 2018-05-05 09:32:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 22,092
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5370353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/underumbrage/pseuds/underumbrage
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"We wouldn’t have had a chance.” Killua responded as he jumped over the wire fence in front of him. He turned and waited for Gon to jump, but something was…wrong. He distantly heard Gon land after jumping, but he felt his reactions almost slow as he saw the fear in Gon’s eyes.</p><p>"Killua, watch out!"</p><p>*<br/>AKA the AU where Gon and Killua didn't escape Nobunaga during the Yorknew City ark and where their lives went after becoming Spiders.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Get Out Alive

**Author's Note:**

  * For [christmascronus (tumblr)](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=christmascronus+%28tumblr%29).



> Alright, so I tried...sO HAR D,,, ON THis. I really hope you like it christmascronus!! :D I tried making Hisoka less creepy in this bc I know you both like and hate him lmao. I had to take some liberties with this story, so some things may stray from what you originally thought!
> 
> Happy Holidays Squee!
> 
> (I'm your SS (wow, shocker I know), my name is Mercedes, and I hope we can be friends :D)
> 
> ((This is unbeta'd as my older brother decided to flake out on me, so please pardon any mistakes!))

“I checked on the trip here, they really don’t know anything.”

Both Gon and Killua fastened their eyes on the blonde woman before them.

_‘How…?’_ Killua wondered, feeling a cold sweat dripping down his back. He could feel Hisoka’s gaze resting on him, flickering between both him and Gon.

“If Pakunoda says so, then it must be true…” Machi said softly.

Killua heard Hisoka shift behind him, the razor sharp card pressed against his neck finally being removed, allowing him the chance to approach Gon.

“Oi, Gon…Did they do anything to you on the way here?” Killua asked softly in a whisper.

“No, they just asked me a few questions.” Gon responded, looking as mystified as Killua felt.

_‘By touch maybe? Damn…When they first asked I had no idea, but now I have that image in my mind! If she checks again she’ll know it’s Kurapika!’_ Killua thought, feeling a shiver of fear run through his body.

A gruff voice pulled Killua out of his thoughts.

“If they have nothing to do with the chain user, can we let them go?” Franklin asked.

“Yeah, there’s no point in keeping them here.” Shalnark confirmed. “Our target is the chain user. We should ignore everyone  
else.”

“There you go. You kids are lucky.” Feitan said, sounding bored and slightly agitated.

Gon stuck his tongue out at the smaller man while Killua remained on guard.

“No, not yet.” A voice caught both boys attention. “I won’t let them leave.”

Nobunaga sat with his back resting against an alter. “Kid, join the spiders. Team up with me.”

Killua stiffened as he realized it was directed towards Gon.

“No way. I’d rather die than join you guys.” Gon said defiantly.

Nobunaga laughed before saying, “He really hates us…Hey kid, you’re an enhancer, aren’t you?”

“What of it?” Gon asked.

“I _knew_ it!” Nobunaga continued laughing, earning strange looks from Killua, Gon, and the rest of the troupe.

“Hey! We’re keeping them here until the boss comes back. I’m going to recommend that we recruit them!” Nobunaga said to the rest of the troupe.

“Are you serious?” Phinks asked incredulously.

“The boss would never agree to that.” Kortopi said quietly.

“Fine, have it your way.” Machi said. “But if they escape then that’s your fault.” She finished.

Nobunaga grinned as he led both of the boys away to a separate room to wait for Chrollo.

*

“Maannn…I really wanted to beat him up!” Gon whined playfully, a pout set on his lips.

Both boys were running from the building, intending on making tracks as far away as possible.

“Idiot…That would have been impossible. He’d have fought you off and killed you.”

“Are you one hundred percent sure though?” Gon asked.

“Yes. We wouldn’t have had a chance.” Killua responded as he jumped over the wire fence in front of him. He turned and waited for Gon to jump, but something was…wrong. He distantly heard Gon land after jumping, but he felt his reactions almost slow as he saw the fear in Gon’s eyes.

“Killua, _watch out!_ ” Gon shouted.

A soft brush of fingers was all the warning Killua had before an iron grip clamped down on his neck. Panic rushed through his body, and he began to wonder how he could get out of this situation before either of them could get hurt.

“It’s her...” Gon said softly enough for Killua to hear.

Pakunoda.

_‘Shit, I need to redirect my thoughts, somehow!_ ’ Killua tried thinking of all the places where he and Gon had been before, but that lead him back to the Hunter’s exam…Back to when he met Kurapika. Once he began thinking of Kurapika, all the thoughts he had tried repressing all came back full force, filling his mind.

“…Got it. I found the chain user.” Pakunoda murmured softly before releasing Killua’s neck.

“ _Haaa?_ Didn’t you already check the brat? How could you miss something like the chain user?” Nobunaga questioned, sounding hopeful but doubtful as he jumped the fence behind Gon and got a grip on the back of his jacket.

“Something we said must have led him to recall about the chain user. He might not have known at the time I asked originally, but after hearing us speak about him for a bit he figured it out himself.” Pakunoda guessed.

Killua remained in place, knowing that if he moved it could spell the end for Gon who was in Nobunaga’s grasp. Nobunaga had his hand on the hilt of his sword, his thumb pressing upwards to show a sliver of the reflective blade inside.

A warning to Killua and Gon both, no doubt.

“So, who is it?” Machi asked, appearing from behind Pakunoda with Hisoka in tow.

“A young blond boy. The name I got from this one’s memories was Kurapika.” Pakunoda answered monotonously.

Killua saw Gon’s eyes widen a fraction as he stared at Pakunoda before they locked with his.

“No, that can’t be right! It can’t be Kurapika!” Gon said, denial clear on his face. A sudden jerk of Nobunaga’s wrist had Gon dangling helplessly above the ground.

“Paku wouldn’t lie to us about something this serious…And to think you almost got away.” Nobunaga said calmly, although anger was clear in his eyes.

“I still want you to join. Hisoka! Grab the white haired one for me, will you? I’ll lock them up good this time until Danchou gets back.”

Hisoka said nothing as he firmly grasped Killua by the back of his neck. From his prior experience with Hisoka, Killua knew that he wouldn’t hesitate to kill him if he retaliated.

*

“Just where is Danchou anyways?” Franklin asked, having gotten back a little earlier than the others.

“I don’t know, but we do know who the chain user is now.” Machi said.

This tidbit of information caught Franklin’s interest, but before he could draw a breath to ask any questions, Nobunaga interrupted him.

“We will be having a meeting regarding the chain user when Danchou gets back, so you’ll find out all we know about him during that time. If you don’t mind too much, stay here and help us look after these two. They nearly gave me the slip earlier, and that would have cost us the information that we just got.” Nobunaga said.

Franklin raised an eyebrow, glancing over at the two youths who were tied up back to back in the center of the room.

“I do wish someone had called me earlier so this meeting could have been held sooner.” A soothing voice said from the doorway. Every member of the troupe in the room immediately stood, watching the person entering the room with rapt attention.

“Danchou…” Machi murmured softly, bowing her head slightly.

Chrollo nodded at her, a pleasant look on his face.

“So, these two are his friends…Correct?” Chrollo asked, stopping in front of Killua.

“That’s correct, Danchou. I have a favor to ask about them, though…” Nobunaga answered.

Chrollo spent another second looking over Gon and Killua before turning to acknowledge Nobunaga’s request.

“I want one of them to join the troupe. The black haired kid is an Enhancer like Uvogin was. I feel like he could best take his place.” Nobunaga stated.

Gon froze before removing his gaze from the floor to that man who wore a furred jacket in front of him. The man had an infinitely sad gaze to him, but also managed to look wise…and incredibly dangerous.

“Do you think he would be of use? Would he cooperate with us, or would he try to sabotage us?” Chrollo asked.

“Ah…” Nobunaga hesitated.

“We have plenty of information we could use against him, Danchou.” Pakunoda said from the side. Chrollo cocked his head towards her before he smiled softly and returned his gaze to rest upon Killua.

“Fine. The black haired one shall stay. He’ll be under your care, Nobunaga. Wherever you go, he goes as well. But what about this one?” Chrollo asked, a calculating look appearing in his eyes.

Gon began to shake in anger.

“You can’t decide that for me! I won’t join, I’d rather die! You can’t make me do anything to help you sick bastards out!” Gon shouted.

“…Oh? We can’t? I wouldn’t be so sure of that if I were you.” Chrollo said with a small smile.

He reached forward and grabbed Killua by the front of his shirt and lifted so Killua was face to face with him.

“From what I heard from Pakunoda, this boy…he’s your best friend, is he not? It would be a shame if…something were to happen to him. Perhaps Feitan will get a chance to extract even more information from him after a good torture session?” Chrollo mused darkly.

Gon began to feel a cold sweat drip down his spine as he said, “You wouldn’t…”

“Oh, but I really _would_. It was your friend that took Uvogin from us, shouldn’t you do something to help us mourn for our lost friend?” Chrollo asked.

Gon grit his teeth together as he realized that his hands were tied in more ways than one. If he didn’t do as they said, they would kill Killua, but if he did do as they said…he would be forced to kill innocent people.

Irrational thoughts began to cloud his mind as anger filled him. He became deaf to Killua’s shouts of _“Don’t do it Gon! It’s not worth it!”._

“…”

“What was that? I didn’t quite hear you.” Chrollo said.

“…I said, you have…A deal…” Gon murmured softly.

“Ah, wonderful.” Chrollo dropped Killua who remained in a steely silence, unable to look at Gon.

“Just let Killua go. Let him leave, and I’ll…I’ll do as you say. I promise.” Gon said, unable to look up from the ground.

“You heard your friend. You’re free to go.” Nobunaga said as he cut the ropes binding Killua.

Killua remained put, fear coursing through his veins.

_‘How can I get us out of this? How can I…How can I save us both?’_

“I won’t…I won’t leave.” Killua said softly.

“Hm? You won’t leave? Your friend just sold his freedom to us for you, and you’re not going to take the chance that he gave you to go?” Chrollo asked incredulously.

“Wherever Gon goes, I go! I’m not leaving hi-“

“Killua, just go! Leave now! Find Leorio and talk to him, tell him I’m sorry and-and tell Aunt Mito I’m sorry, too. I want you to be the one who tells her about what I’ve done…” Gon started out strong, but his voice got weak near the end.

“Idiot, I’m not leaving you! What do I have to do to become a member as well?” Killua asked fiercely, directing his words to Chrollo.

“In order to become a member of the troupe, you must defeat and kill another member, but you’ll find that harder than you’d think-“ Chrollo was cut off by Killua darting past him.

A slight yelp and the squelch of something wet was all Chrollo heard before he turned around to see blood spattered against the wall and Kortopi’s head lying on the floor. Killua’s hand was extended, his nails sharpened to deadly points coated in blood. Killua slowly turned to Chrollo, a hollow look in his eyes.

“Done. Now what do I do?” He asked, his voice flat and devoid of all emotion. A loud crash was heard as Kortopi’s body finally hit the ground after being brutally murdered.

Chrollo eyed the blood coating everything disdainfully, but kept his face neutral.

“Now you’ve earned the right to become a member of the troupe. Congratulations, Killua…” Chrollo trailed off.

“You will be under Feitan’s command. You will learn from him how to extract information from people without killing them, as it seems you are already an assassin. A very skilled one to boot. Although I have to wonder…Are you related to Illumi, by chance?” Chrollo asked.

Killua stiffened, refusing to answer the question.

“So it seems we have a Zoldyck in our presence. How fortunate, I was going to call Silva and ask one of his sons to replace Uvogin anyways. You’ve saved me some trouble, so thank you.” Chrollo finished before motioning to Feitan.

Feitan reached forward, attempting to grab Killua’s wrist to lead him to his room but Killua lashed out and managed to rip the cloth covering Feitan’s arm before he pulled his hand back. Killua found himself in the air once again, Feitan’s hand squeezing his throat with an almost crushing amount of force.

_‘What is with these guys and holding people above the ground? Even the short ones do it!’_ Killua thought as he struggled to get out of Feitan’s grip.

“Feitan, drop him. You know the rules, no serious fights between spiders.” Shalnark said sounding angered, his eyes staying on Kortopi's corpse.

“Remember, Killua Zoldyck: You chose to be here of your own free will ♣. Any misbehaving you do will have dire consequences for you dear friend…Gon, was it~♠?” Hisoka said, playing along. Even though he wouldn’t actually hurt Killua or Gon, his bloodlust was very, _very_ real. A menacing aura surrounded both Killua and Hisoka, attracting the attention of the few Spiders who weren’t watching the fight previously.

“Hisoka, stand down. Take Gon to the place where he will reside for now, Nobunaga will take care of him in the morning. Feitan, try using a little…Tact. He’s clearly pissed and you aren’t making anything better.” Machi said.

“In fact, I think I’ll take Killua to his room. You can deal with him later.” She finished, reaching out for Killua but stopping before she touched him. She led him up a set of stairs with her hand hovering behind him near his lower back.

“Machi sure is good at that…” Hisoka murmured, a soft smile on his face as he watched the two leave the room.

Gon was still unable to look up, shame and disbelief coursing through him. He distantly felt Hisoka grab his arm to heft him up, and felt something sharp cut through the ropes binding him.

“Gon? Gon, now isn’t the time to be in shock~♦. Follow me.” Hisoka said.

Hisoka kept his grip on Gon’s arm, but as Gon’s movements continued to prove sluggish and uncoordinated Hisoka picked Gon up and settled him on his shoulders to prevent Gon from tripping and hurting himself.

“You’re starting to shut down now, aren’t you?” Hisoka mumbled, not expecting an answer. He got exactly what he had expected, drawing a sigh from his lips.

“Gon, you did this to yourself ♣. There’s nothing I can nor could have done to help you. All I can do is pretend to not know what is going on, and that isn’t going to get both you and Killua very far, you know ♠?” Hisoka explained.

At the mention of Killua’s name, Gon sat up a bit, no longer leaning heavily on Hisoka’s head.

“Killua…I wanted-I wanted him gone…! I wanted him safe…” Gon said numbly, distress clear in his voice.

“I know.” Were the only words of comfort Hisoka could offer the boy.

He stopped in front of a door on the third floor but sighed and turned around to see Machi walking towards him.

“His friend has gone temporarily mute. He won’t talk to me now, so I’m not sure how long Feitan will be able to stand him if this keeps up. Danchou may need to be the one to mentor the Zoldyck if this continues.” She said, glancing up at Gon who rested tiredly on Hisoka’s shoulders. She raised an eyebrow, but said nothing of it as she brushed past Hisoka and continued on her way.

“They both seem to be shutting down, Machi~♥. Which room did you place him in?” Hisoka asked cheerily, turning after her form.

“Second to the left. The first room is locked and Feitan’s is right next to his, so be quiet.” Machi said without turning around.

Hisoka hummed under his breath as he continued to walk in the direction Machi had just left.

“Gon, this is all I can do for you…♣ Make of it what you will.” Hisoka said as he stopped in front of a door. He easily opened it before he lifted Gon off of his shoulders and placed him in the doorway.

“Make sure to be quiet. And don’t be too angry~♣ Something good will come of this, my unripe fruit...” Hisoka drawled as he turned and waved over his shoulder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It hurt my heart to have Kortopi killed off so soon like that, but for advancing the plot it was needed T.T
> 
> ((Imagine the rest of the Troupe cleaning up the mess and holding a funeral for him, with each one telling a story they shared with Kortopi...oh, now i made myself sad.))
> 
> I was asked on my tumblr to include song links, so [here's the title song,](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fpzsatvy28k) and [here's the chapter title song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=miFhwa1_fwE) :)


	2. Stressed Out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So each chapter is gonna be named after the songs I was listening to while I was writing, so I'm sorry if the titles make no sense in correlation to the actual fic >.>

Gon remained in the doorway, staring after Hisoka’s retreating form until he could no longer see the red-haired magician. Even a little while after he could no longer see him, Gon stood in the doorway staring blankly into space. He seemingly was left alone once again for his thoughts to consume him.

“Gon…? What did Hisoka say? Are you…mad at me?” He heard a familiar voice ask him.

Gon slowly turned, a dead look in his eyes as he fully faced Killua who was curled up tightly on the bed near the far wall. No words left his lips as he closed the door and approached the bed where Killua sat, said boy moving to make room for Gon as well. Gon crawled on top of the springy bed, vaguely registering the awful creaking noise the bed emitted.

“Killua…What have I done? What have you done…?” Gon asked, fear finally sliding into its rightful place in his eyes.

Killua had no words for Gon and only shook his head as a response.

“I don’t know what to do, Killua. You’re supposed to be the smart one, but you made a choice as stupid as the one I made…” Gon trailed off.

“Maybe your stupid is finally rubbing off on me, huh Gon.” Killua said, side eyeing Gon.

Gon huffed indignantly and didn’t respond, but Killua saw the beginnings of a small smile on his lips.

Killua let out an explosive sigh before attempting to recline on the extremely small and tattered bed.

“Well, I guess it doesn’t matter now. We made the choice, and now we’re stuck with it…We don’t have to like it, but we _do_ have to deal with it. And Gon…? Do me a favor?” Killua asked.

“Hmm? What is it?” Gon asked, trying to lie down as well on the remaining space the bed had.

“Don’t blame yourself for this. At all. I made the choice to join, and I wa-“ Gon suddenly cut him off.

“Why did you though? Why would you make the choice to be a-a _killer_ and a _thief_?!”

Gon had propped himself up on his elbow to look at Killua, who was avoiding his gaze.

“Gon…In case you forgot, I _already_ **am** a killer.” Killua said softly. “And besides, I wasn’t going to leave you alone. Like I said, wherever you go, I go. That’s what best friends do, right?”

Gon fell silent before letting out another sigh and flopping heavily on the bed, causing a cacophony of creaks to sound off.

“Killua…” He started.

“What?”

“I think you did catch my stupid after all.” Gon said tiredly.

Killua let out a soft laugh before he reached behind him and grabbed a pillow and swung it directly at Gon.

Gon spluttered before a smile grew on his face and he reached for a pillow as well. Killua dodged the pillow as Gon threw it at him and promptly hit Gon once again with the one in his hand.

“Killua!” Gon whined playfully. “I was trying to be serious here!”

“I’m just shocked it took you so long to realize that your stupid was contagious, idiot!” Killua laughed as he attempted to once again hit Gon with a pillow. Gon grabbed the pillow from Killua’s hand and stood up on the bed while repeatedly hitting Killua as best he could.

Killua dashed from the bed towards the other pillow that Gon had thrown earlier and quickly threw it back towards him. Gon caught the other pillow and smiled broadly at Killua who had realized his mistake.

“Well, shit.” Killua laughed as Gon jumped off of the bed and chased him around the room, their laughter echoing off the stone walls.

Killua had planned on running at the door then turning at the last second so Gon would hit it, but as he was about to turn it opened abruptly, leading to Killua smacking his face on the door.

Gon had started to laugh and was about to ask Killua if he was alright before a quieter voice spoke up, sounding irritated.

“I imagine that Hisoka had something to do with this little room arrangement, is that correct?” Feitan asked, glancing at Gon then moving his eyes to Killua.

Killua’s hands covered the bottom on his face, a trickle of blood spilling to the floor.

“You dumbass! You don’t open doors without knocking first, that hurt!” Killua’s words were a bit muffled until he finally removed his hands to inspect the damage that had been done. Gon noted that Killua had a slight bloody nose and his lower lip was split.

Feitan snorted at the sight before saying, “Try being quieter and this won’t happen again. The next time you two decide to have…” Feitan trailed off, seeing the pillows in Gon’s hands. “…A _pillow fight,_ make sure it’s far enough away so that _I can’t hear you.”_

The door slammed shut with a slight tremble, causing flecks of stone and dust to shower from the ceiling onto both of the boys.

“…You have the worst mentor ever, Killua.” Gon said, still staring at the door.

“Tell me about it…” Killua said, wiping idly at the blood on his chin.

“There is a box in the corner, do you want me to check and see if there’s anything that can be used to help you clean up?” Gon asked, already heading towards the box.

Killua nodded, deciding that staining his clothes on the first day in this hell hole wasn’t really the best choice.

After spending a bit of time cleaning up, Killua and Gon agreed it would be best to head to sleep and both crawled on the creaking bed. It was a tight fit, but they both managed to squeeze on in a semi comfortable position. Gon fell asleep to the sound of Killua breathing behind him, but Killua stayed awake until Gon’s gentle breathing and soothing heartbeat lulled him to unconsciousness.

*

After a brief talk with Nobunaga, Feitan watched the two boys sleeping, idly curled around each other much like cats. Killua had one arm under his own head, while the other was haphazardly thrown over Gon's waist. Gon was curled into a tight ball, Killua's chin resting against the crown of his head.

“As touching as this is, it’s damn near noon. We need to start training, Zoldyck.” Feitan took in the scene before him, watching as Killua shot up out of the bed like a bullet and was immediately in a defensive position. Gon, however, sat up slowly and blearily rubbed at his eyes.

Feitan noted Gon’s childishness, but he wasn’t here for him.

“Zoldyck, get ready. We leave in a half hour. We won’t be back for a few weeks at the minimum.”

“Wait, we aren’t training here?!” Killua asked quickly. “I thought I was allowed to stay with Gon!”

“You stay with him by being a member of the troupe. We are always with each other, never doubt that.” Feitan responded monotonously.

“We leave in 25. Get ready, although you don’t have much with you.” Feitan finished before he turned to leave the room. Both boys noticed that he closed the door with much more carefulness than last night.

“Where’s the samurai guy?” Gon asked, decidedly more awake now than he was before.

“Huh? Nobunaga? I don’t know, he wasn’t here with the short guy.” Killua answered, wondering why he was given so long to get his shit together if he **had** no shit to get together.

“Yeah he was, he was at the doorway talking to your mentor before he tried to wake us up. I pretended to be asleep so he might change his mind about coming to get us, but that didn't seem to bother the shorter guy." Gon said with a rueful grin.

"Zoldyck!" A shout came from outside the door.

"Jeez, that was like 5 minutes..." Killua grumbled before he slid off the bed once again.

Gon watched quietly as Killua quickly slipped on his shoes and jogged to the door to meet up with Feitan.

"Hey...Killua?" Gon said softly.

Killua stopped, his hand resting on the doorknob.

"What's up, Gon?" Killua asked, not turning around.

"...Thanks for being my best friend. I'll see you soon!" Gon smiled as he brought his knees to his chest while he remained sitting on the bed.

"...Yeah. See you too, Gon."

Gon waved at Killua's retreating back until he heard the soft click of the door closing. The finality in that click resonated with Gon until Nobunaga came to collect him not too long later.

*

"So, how long have you and that Zoldyck boy known each other?" Nobunaga asked, attempting to create small talk while they walked.

Gon said nothing, keeping his steely gaze fixated on the ground in front of him. They had been walking in silence for hours, traveling through multiple towns and even a city only to end up in another hole in the wall town.

A soft sigh fell from Nobunaga's lips before he perked up, saying "Hey, we're almost there!" He gently nudged Gon until he moved his eyes upwards to spot a small building that had no sign on it. The windows were blacked out but all were intact at the very least.

Gon decided he didn't like that building from that moment on.

*

Killua thought the exact same thing when he spotted the small building on the corner of the road a couple minutes before Gon did. The people in the town made a wide berth around it, like they would get the plague if they stood too close to it.

"Tch, what is that place? A morgue?" Killua muttered to himself, expecting that Feitan would drag him past the shop. Despite what he thought, Feitan began pulling him directly to the small shop, extending a hand to push the door open.

"H-hey, I thought we were going to go train? Where are you taking me, shorty?" Killua growled out, struggling against Feitan's grip on the back of his shirt.

"I never said we were training, I just said that we were going." Was Feitan's only answer to Killua's question. He purposely ignored Killua's quip about his height and continued to drag the boy inside the surprisingly well lit room.

"Welcome to the ' _B' Tattoo Parlor_ , Zoldyck." Feitan said after a moment, and Killua felt his heart drop.

_Well, shit._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The B stands for Bitchin' lmao
> 
> [Here's the chapter song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8esYwLKnIaY)


	3. Tattoo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eyyy lmao at least the song I listened to for this chapter fits! I had to spend a lot of time looking up the different types of needles needed for a tattoo machine, only to find out that the information wasn't at all relevant or needed to this chapter lmao at least I am Well Informed™
> 
> (I have the headcanon that Killua has Trypanophobia because of Illumi, so that plays a brief part in this chapter)

Feitan brought a struggling Killua into the room of the tattoo parlor. It was a small building, extremely clean inside, and in the middle of nowhere.

“Ah, Fei.” A burly man covered in tattoos spoke from behind the counter, idly wiping his hands off with a dark towel.

“Who’s this runt you’ve got with you? Another new one?” The man asked, a smile lighting up his face. Despite looking rather intimidating, this man seemed very friendly in Killua’s eyes.

“Yeah, he’s new. Killed Kortopi right in front of us, just so he could join with his friend.” Feitan said, sounding slightly bitter.

“Kortopi? Didn’t he just barely get his tattoo a few months ago? Wow, what a shame. Quiet kid, but I kinda liked him. Oh well, can’t be helped I guess…So there’ll be another coming in soon?” He asked as he led Killua and Feitan over to a seat with supplies neatly placed next to it.

“Today. Nobunaga should be bringing him here at any moment-“ The cheery jingle of the bell on the door rang, announcing the presence of another person. Nobunaga had Gon with him, following him obediently with no restraints of any sort on him. At seeing Killua, Gon perked up and ran past Nobunaga, who let him go with a small smile.

“Killua! I didn’t know that you’d be getting your tattoo on the same day as I would be!” Gon said with a large smile on his face.

“Same. Do you know where you are going to get yours?” Killua asked, cursing internally as he realized that he hadn’t thought about where to place his tattoo either.

“I _have_ thought about it, actually…” Gon trailed off, a distant look in his eyes.

Killua, realizing his mistake in bringing up the permanent reminder that they would forever be a part of the troupe, mustered up a smile and lightly punched Gon on the arm.

“Hey, don’t think of it as something to bind us! Think of it as us getting matching tattoos like we had talked about a while ago.” Killua said, the thought bringing him to higher spirits as well.

Gon managed a smile as he was sat down in the seat adjacent to the one Killua was in, and held out his arm to the tattooist that sat before him.

“So you want it on your arm, huh hun?” The pretty blond woman asked, the gum in her mouth snapping as she popped the bubble she just blew.

“I want it on my wrist, please!” Gon said with a small smile. _‘So it can serve as a reminder…_ ’ Gon thought stonily.

Killua raised a brow, wondering why Gon would get it on his wrist of all places. _‘It’s in plain sight! Anyone could see it unless he wraps it up…Unless he wants them to see it.’_ Killua nearly paled at his next thoughts.

_‘Maybe it’s to remind him of what he’s done. Every time he reaches out to hurt someone for the troupe, he’ll see that mark there and be reminded of what he chose to do. To remind him that his hands were bound and tied as he was forced to take this deal…’_

“…ou want it, kid?”

“W-what?” Killua stuttered out, not hearing the burly man the first time he spoke.

“I asked where you wanted your tattoo. My name’s Scott, by the way.” The bigger man smiled before reaching out with a heavily tattooed arm to grasp Killua’s significantly smaller hand.

“Killua. Killua Zoldyck. And I was thinking…On the neck?” Killua said, still considering where he could place this burdensome mark of shame.

“The neck huh? That might hurt a shit ton…But it looks like you’re the type to be able to handle pain.” Scott mused.

“Yeah. I’ve decided. I want the tattoo on the back of my neck, if you could.” Killua said.

_‘So it can be just as much of a reminder to me that I’m doing this for Gon. That I would rather have my neck slit before I betray him…’_

“Alrighty then. You realize you’re neck is gonna hurt like a bitch from both lying in an awkward position for so long and from the needles being inserted, right?” Scott asked before bringing over what appeared to be a neck rest.

Killua stiffened at the mention of needles ( _‘Of course there’s going to be needles! You’re getting a tattoo, stupid!’_ ), but nodded regardless.

In a matter of minutes both Gon and Killua were seated in nearby stations, ready to seal and bind themselves to the troupe permanently.

“Okay, so do you want us to let you know before we start tattooing you, or to just go for it? We have a policy to ask this to anyone under 18, otherwise you’d be just about done by now!” Scott said, laughing.

Killua shook his head no as best he could in his current face down position, feeling rough fingers gently pulling the hairs at the nape of his neck up to pin them out of the way with a hair clip.

*

Gon smiled at the kindly woman before him before smiling and saying, “I’m fine! Go right ahead.”

Killua, trying to focus on Gon’s conversation with the soothing woman, flinched as he felt cold metal lightly brush his neck, but he felt no pain as Scott hesitated.

“You do know that when I pass over any bones in your neck, it will feel like they will break right? They won’t of course, but I just want to be sure you know what you’re in for…” He trailed off, sounding unsure.

Killua let out a soft sigh before saying, “I’m not gonna break, old man! I know what I’m in for, so go ahead already.”

Scott laughed heartily while saying, “Old man, am I? Well aren’t you full of piss and vinegar? I like you kid, don’t change.”

“Do you have it under control from here on out, Scott?” Nobunaga asked, leaning against the front desk.

“Yeah, sure. They can’t leave in the middle of a tattoo being done or they’ll bleed something fierce. Should I keep ‘em here until you get back?” Scott asked.

“If you can, we’ll only be a bit.” Feitan said, already heading out of the front door with Nobunaga following him.

A loud jingle sounded as the door once again closed, signaling that the two older troupe members had finally left.

Gon was still staring at the door before a soft buzzing noise went off, prompting Gon to try and pull his arm away as a reflex.

A firm hand gripped his upper arm, holding him in place.

“Nu-uh hun, you can’t pull away while I’m working on you! You could get hurt real bad, or you could mess up the tattoo.” Said the kindly woman, her voice firm.

Gon smiled sheepishly as he relaxed his muscles, allowing the woman to manipulate his arm into a more comfortable position as she once again picked up the tattoo machine. She began her work quietly, only stopping to ask Gon if he was okay every now and then.

Killua, on the other hand, was trying to not freak out.

“Kid, you’re too tense, relax a bit. I know it hurts, but if you want this tattoo to look bitchin’ then I need you to chill some.” Scott said, lightly patting Killua’s shoulder.

Killua immediately relaxed some, not realizing that he had been tense to begin with.

“S-sorry, old man. Not a big fan of needles is all…” Killua gritted out between clenched teeth, not liking the feeling of the stinging metal sinking into his flesh.

“Ne, Killua!” Gon said, resting his chin on his right hand. “Do you need to hold my hand?”

Killua knew that Gon wasn’t trying to sound like a smug little shit, but _boy howdy_ did he wish he could reach across the table and smack his arm.

“No, I’m good. Actually…” A wicked grin grew on Killua’s face (not that Gon could see it because Killua was face down). “Yeah, hold my hand Gon. We both know you need a steady hand to hold on to too.” Killua jeered at him.

“I do not!” Gon said indignantly, but Killua felt cold fingers probe at his own until their hands were laced together.

*

It started out as a gentle pressure, Killua gently gripping at Gon’s own hand almost as if he was trying to focus on something other than the pain. Gon didn’t mind at all, letting Killua grip his hand as though it were a life line.

Suddenly a crushing force enveloped his hand, eliciting a yelp from Gon who jolted in his seat.

"What's the matter, hun?! Did I hurt'cha?" The blonde woman asked nervously, moving the tattoo machine away from Gon's wrist.

"N-no, I'm fine." Gon gritted out, Killua's grip getting tighter.

"Kid, stop laughing!" Gon heard Scott chuckle as he placed a warm hand on Killua's shoulder to stop him from laughing more.

Oh. That little shit...

_'Oh, now_ _it's on...'_ Gon thought, a smirk growing on his face. 

Killua felt the grip on his own hand get tighter until it matched the strength he was putting in to squeezing Gon's hand. Killua was doing fine...Until Gon's grip got stronger than his own.

_'Well, shit.'_ Killua thought with a grin, slightly shifting his fingers around as best as he could to make the pressure a little bit more bearable.

The rest of the duration that they were getting their tattoo was spent with both of them trying to crush each other's hands while being told to stop moving.

Scott seemed to understand what was going on, shaking his head while laughing at the two of them. His wife, on the other hand, didn't seem to understand why Gon would groan in pain every now and then, shooting questioning and concerned glances at Scott the entire time.

Killua's tattoo was finished first, but instead of feeling relief that the needles were no longer pressing into his skin, he felt a drive to use the last of his strength to break Gon's hand or make him call it quits.

"...Aaaaand there! All done, hun!" Scott's wife said (who had previously introduced herself as Sherry). The moment she took the tattoo machine away from Gon's wrist, he immediately grabbed Killua's other hand and tried exuding as much force as possible to make Killua knock it off.

Scott and Sherry watched the two grappling, one with amusement and the other with slight horror.

A bell jingled within a few minutes, Nobunaga and Feitan standing in the doorway watching the two boys with mild amusement.

"He definitely reminds me of Uvo, _especially_ when he does something like that." Nobunaga said while chuckling fondly.

Feitan paid him no mind and pulled Scott aside to talk with him briefly before he grabbed Killua by the back of his collar once again, effectively pulling him and Gon apart.

"Hey! Let me go!" Killua huffed indignantly, taking a swing at Gon who just giggled and moved back barely enough to get out of his range.

"You were so ready to train this morning, so let's go. You have..." Killua noted how Feitan had a slight look of distaste on his face while he looked him up and down. "A _very_ long way to go. Now come." Feitan ordered, dropping Killua and quickly turning on his heel.

Killua looked irritated but couldn't help laughing when he saw Gon sticking his tongue out at the smaller man.

"I guess I'll...See you later?" Killua offered a tight smile to Gon, who grinned in earnest back at him.

Nobunaga approached Gon from the back and lightly tapped his shoulder to signify that they should get going too.

It was going to be a long few weeks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Scott and Sherry are heavily based off of my bus driver and his wife, who are incidentally also named Scott and Sherry lol
> 
> [Here's the song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RKwIHfZcU9A)


	4. Misty Mountains Cold

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Certain places mentioned in this chapter exist in the HxH world, such as Aokigahara (aka the Suicide Forest) which normally wouldn't exist in this universe. I also added a few things you would normally find at a shrine or holy temple in Japan, such as Torii (big wooden (usually) gates outside of Shinto temples), Yorishiro (an object that can attract or be a vessel to a God), and shimenawa (ropes that are decorated with paper streamers called shide that encircle a Yorishiro).
> 
> I feel like Nobunaga (and previously Uvogin) is a nature kinda guy, so to me it would only make sense if he were to train Gon in a place where both of them felt comfortable. :)

 

Gon nearly flinched and fought the instinct to swat at Nobunaga when he tapped his shoulder, but forced a smile at Killua's back when he turned to leave as well. Nobunaga made no move to speak to him as they began their second trip in silence, Gon mostly focusing on his throbbing fingers (no thanks to Killua) and his left wrist aching in pain.

"...Aren't you curious as to where we're going?" Nobunaga asked after an hour of silence from the normally fiery-tempered boy. Gon said nothing and continued to walk ahead, not even sparing Nobunaga a glance.

Nobunaga sighed, lightly scratching the side of his head.

_'There's nothing I can do to make him talk to me, but if he proves that he won't work with me...We're going to have issues.'_ Nobunaga thought with a frown. He once again began walking past Gon, accelerating slightly if only to make the awkwardly silent trip not last so long.

*

Gon noticed the smell at first.

Where they had been walking for hours upon end earlier smelled of the city-of pollution and acrid metals-but this scent was fresher. It was cold and nearly biting, and remind Gon of Whale Island.

"We're here."

Gon glanced upwards, not expecting a huge mountain trail to be so close to the outskirts of the city they had just left. A torii stood before them both, imposing and red, but Gon could see no shrine nearby.

"I bet you're wondering why there's no shrine?" Nobunaga guessed, smiling when he noticed Gon tense up. "This whole forest is sacred. There's a tree near the center of the forest that not many people visit, and this," Nobunaga gestured to the gate in front of them. "is only the first torii. We will be training by the sacred tree."

"What's wrong? You looked like the nature type to me, and this is where Uvogin and I trained when we were younger." Nobunaga said, noticing Gon's pale face.

"...This isn't Aokigahara, is it?" Gon asked, an unsettling feeling in his gut. Something about the forest seemed...off. It looked normal from the outside, with sun shining brightly from above casting dappled shadows on the forest floor, but the more Gon looked, the more the forest seemed...Warped.

"I can't see that far into the forest, and I feel like something is staring back at me." Gon said slowly, not taking his eyes off of the darkest point he could see.

"This isn't Aokigahara, though with how dense this forest is and how it refracts light farther inside, I can see where you're coming from." Nobunaga clarified with a chuckle.

"And that creepy feeling as though you're being watched? That's probably due to the fact that a God resides in this forest. Now, let's not waste any time. I can tell you more later, let's begin training for now." Nobunaga said, beginning to make his way into the mystifying forest.

Gon hesitated a second before taking a deep breath and following after Nobunaga.

*

"This place looks so strange and otherworldly from the outside because of the mist that constantly surrounds this place. It takes the light and bend it, giving the mountain the appearance of being twisted or warped inside. Some locals say that the mist is what protects this forest and its inhabitants, and frequently those that stray from the worn path inside don't come back out because they become lost. Tourists used to visit this place frequently enough, and some of them spread the rumor that it's a spirit that leads those who wander astray." Nobunaga explained to Gon while traversing through the forest carefully.

Gon spent more time watching his surroundings rather than listening to Nobunaga, but he still found any sort of folklore interesting. His eyes followed the path around them, and with each step he took the more at ease he felt in this forest.

"...What kind of God lives here?" Gon asked hesitantly, eyeing another torii as they passed by it.

"A protector. The God watches over this forest and promotes strength and growth. You'll see the Yorishiro where the God resides in a bit, it's after the 5th gate." Nobunaga answered.

Gon nodded silently, noting that they had already passed by 4 gates. Each gate was more elaborate than the last, but each one looked more worn as well. The fourth gate they passed was cracked and splintering in places, but it was larger than the others. The red paint was peeling and was a dull shade with little to no shine to it.

"Doesn't anyone take care of the torii? They usually signify a shrine is nearby, don't they?" Gon asked, feeling put-off that someone wouldn't take care of a shrine as carefully as they should.

"No one can find the shrine. I'm not even sure _I've_ ever seen the shrine, and Uvo and I spent a solid year training here. Since no one can find it, they decided to let the weather and nature take it's toll on the torii. Ah!" Nobunaga exclaimed with a small smile. "We're here."

Gon saw a huge torii ahead of them, but it had no color to it. It was a light brown with vines snaking their way up the sides. The legs of the torii were thicker than most of the trees in the area, and Gon felt a sense of power fill him at just seeing how well the torii stood against the elements.

"This torii," Nobunaga began, jogging up to it and placing his hand reverently on the massive gate. "Is the oldest one. This is the fifth gate, and the Yorishiro is not too far from here. Uvo and I thought that the God gave this gate and everything nearby protection. The trees are healthier, the land is more fertile, and the animals are more lively around here."

Go lightly placed the palm of his hand against the massive gate, feeling the solid, smooth wood under his fingertips. It felt good to be back in an area away from the hustle and bustle of the busy city life like Whale Island was.

"Hey, we need to keep going. We'll set up camp first because it's getting late." Nobunaga said, motioning to the area beyond the giant torii.

*

Camp hadn't taken too long to set up, considering Gon had nothing with him _to_ set up. Nobunaga sent him off to collect sticks and branches for a fire, and when Gon came back with a large armful of sticks he found Nobunaga with a bucket of water and a fairly large ring of stones.

After starting the fire, Gon had no idea what to do.

If he had been with Killua, they would have laughed and played or they would have told scary stories to each other before they both curled up under a blanket of stars.

He couldn't do any of those things with Nobunaga, nor did he want to.

"So what skills do you have?" Nobunaga asked over the crackling of the fire.

Gon gave a noncommittal shrug as an answer, dragging a sigh from Nobunaga's lips.

"Do you know how to use _Zetsu_ , _Ren_ , _Ten_...?" Nobunaga trailed off, hoping his work wasn't cut out for him.

"I know how to use all of those, Wing taught me." Gon answered before cursing himself mentally.

_'You said too much!'_ He berated himself.

"Alright. You can show me what you've got in the morning, alright? Get some sleep for now, because you won't be getting much after today." Nobunaga said before reclining on the ground behind him.

Gon rolled on to his side, using one of his arms as a pillow.

He could already tell he wasn't going to be getting too much sleep.

*

"So what do you want to show me first?" Nobunaga asked after they had eaten.

Gon hadn't fallen asleep, so to distract himself he went out and fished to try and clear his thoughts. His thoughts hadn't cleared any, but he had managed to catch them both some fish to eat.

"I don't want to show you anything. I don't want to work with you guys!" Gon grumbled and stuck his tongue out at Nobunaga.

Nobunaga made a choked noise in the back of his throat at Gon's display of childishness before he burst into laughter.

"So you don't want to train with me, but I need to train you...You sure are stubborn, aren't you kid? How about this." Nobunaga moved closer to Gon, who forced himself to remain still. "How about whoever wins this round of Ro Sham Bo gets to do what they want for the day?" Nobunaga offered, holding his fist out to Gon. Gon glanced at Nobunaga's fist before giving the man a confused look.

"Ro Sham Bo? Do you not know what that is? Ah, it's also called Rock, Paper, Scissor if that helps." Nobunaga said. Gon nodded his head, recognizing the second name for the game. He made a split decision before he held out his fist to Nobunaga as well.

"Ready? Ro...Sham...Bo!" Nobunaga shook his fist up and down once for every word, Gon doing the same. At the final moment, both males moved their hands to form different shapes.

Nobunaga let out a sigh.

"Alright. You won that fair and square, today we do nothing. We'll do this again tomorrow as well. Go ahead and wander around if you want, but remember..." Nobunaga extended his _En_ to surround the nearby area. "Don't go too far or try to leave."

"Or else what?" Gon challenged, not liking being told what he could and couldn't do by the older male.

"Or else there'll be hell to pay for you and your friend with Feitan." Nobunaga clarified, placing his hand on the edge of his sword. Gon's eyes lingered on Nobunaga's hand and the glint of the sharp metal he could see past the sheath.

He would have tried getting away if Nobunaga hadn't of mentioned Killua.

*

The Rock, Paper, Scissors continued for the next 4 days, each one ending with Nobunaga losing against Gon.

_'At this rate, I might as well give up even **thinking** of training him!'_ Nobunaga thought, exasperated.

"Why won't you work with me at all?" Nobunaga asked shortly after losing another game to Gon.

"Isn't that obvious?" Gon spat, refusing to look at Nobunaga. With the way the trip had started, Nobunaga thought Gon would be a little more willing to comply with him, he didn't expect Gon to be so difficult and stubborn.

_'Just like Uvogin...'_ Nobunaga thought with a resigned sigh. If Gon was anything like Uvogin was, Nobunaga had no chance in hell of ever getting Gon to work things out with him.

_'Not unless the kid comes to trust me. I can't let my guard down around this kid for a second or else he'll try to get away! If he were serious about it, I would have no way in hell of catching him. I think the only reason he's stayed so far is because of his friend...I wonder if Fei's having as hard of a time as I am right now?'_

Suddenly Nobunaga sat up straight, startling Gon who had been sitting quietly across the fire from him drawing in the dirt.

_'If he doesn't trust me, I have to trust him! It was the exact same with Uvo!'_ Nobunaga could have hit himself with how he didn't think of something like that sooner.

*

After 6 days of consecutive wins from Gon, Nobunaga finally won a round of Ro Sham Bo. He wasn't so concerned with how the training that day would go, his plans were more focused on after the training for the day was over.

Gon begrudgingly showed Nobunaga the skills he had acquired previously from Wing, and Nobunaga gave him pointers on what he could fix here and there, but Gon proved to be uncooperative every now and then.

After doing what could be done within the hours of light they had, Nobunaga put out the fire at their camp and began picking things up.

"Grab whatever you have and let's go." Nobunaga ordered, making sure the fire was completely out before he began to leave. 

"Are we done training already?" Gon asked, and Nobunaga didn't miss the hint of hopefulness in the youth's voice.

"No, we're just making a change of scenery. Now follow me, and fast. It's getting pretty dark." Nobunaga began a brisk pace towards the massive torii they had passed on the way to their campsite, but turned at the last moment and began walking towards a particularly foggy area.

Gon walked without a word, feeling uneasy once again. He had thought he was used to the forest, but something was ahead of both of them, something larger and more imposing than even the entire troupe. When Gon got closer, he could finally see what it was that cast such a large shadow.

A tree.

A tree unlike any Gon had seen before. It was easily larger than any tree Gon had seen on Whale Island, and he couldn't see the top of it as it stretched so high into the air that the fog swallowed it up. It's roots were gnarled and huge, extending like fingers clawing into the earth before them.

The tree rippled energy, practically pulsating with life. Gon was amazed at how it gave off a pressure of sorts, and it was no wonder to him that he had felt uneasy.

"It's incredible, isn't it? This was where Uvo and I trained for the longest time. Uvo tried climbing the tree to reach the top, but he didn't want to damage the tree. I don't think anyone has ever seen the top of this tree, but it isn't a World Tree. It must be the next biggest thing though." Nobunaga said, approaching the tree.

Gon noticed the shimenawa encircling the tree, and how even the shide that were fluttering in the slight breeze were still in tact.

"Is this tree the shrine?" Gon asked, still struggling in vain to see the top of the tree.

"It could be. I made a mistake in telling you that this tree was a Yorishiro...Like I said earlier, a God lives here. If a God is inside of a vessel, that vessel becomes known as a shintai." Nobunaga said.

They went about setting up camp again, Gon casting amazed glances at the tree every now and then. Once the fire was ablaze once more, Nobunaga set about making food for them.

"You know...You can touch it. It's sacred, so be very careful with it and do not in _any_ _way_ damage it." Nobunaga reminded him.

Gon briefly looked back at him before he took the few step that led him to the trunk of the enormous tree. Gon traced his fingertips along the rough bark, not missing how energy seemed to fill him. A smile grew on his face to feel a tree so _alive_ , and suddenly Gon felt like he was home again. 

_'This tree feels so...comforting. It reminds me of Whale Island, of sitting in the trees back home where I would fish and spend time with the animals...It's so...powerful. I thought Nobunaga was joking, but this tree really does make someone feel strong, like they can grow...'_

"It's amazing, isn't it?" Nobunaga asked quietly, having walked up to the tree near Gon. He rested his palm flat on the surface, letting out a soft sigh before pulling away and sitting near the fire.

"It is amazing. Thank you." Gon said earnestly, still enraptured by the tree.

Nobunaga felt a smile tug at his lips.

_'And now the real training begins.'_

*

It was a small start, but after encountering the tree Gon began to realize how important the entire forest was to Nobunaga. Every now and then after training he would tell Gon stories of his earlier years there with Uvogin. He would tell Gon about all of the places he and Uvogin had went, about the things they had learned; and more importantly, Nobunaga began to open up to Gon.

Months passed this way, with each of them slowly opening up to the other, sharing stories and learning something new about the other. Training made slow progress, and every now and then Gon would still challenge Nobunaga to a game of Rock Paper Scissors to see what would be done that day.

Today was one of the days that Gon had lost, meaning Nobunaga decided the agenda.

"One thing you definitely need to work on is your _Hatsu_. Have you thought about what you want your _Hatsu_ to be like?" Nobunaga asked Gon curiously while mentally cheering at the fact he won.

"My... _Hatsu_? Ah! Killua mentioned _Hatsu_ a while ago, but I couldn't come up with anything..." Gon said with a slight pout.

"Is there anything you like? You're an Enhancer, so think of some physical activity that you enjoy doing. Do you like running, do you like fighting...?" Nobunaga tried fishing around, trying to give Gon some room to work with.

Metaphorical steam began to spout from Gon's ears, a miserable look on his face as he began thinking too hard.

Nobunaga began to laugh, smacking Gon on the shoulder to knock him out of it, saying "Okay, Gon let's take this slow. Let's try more vague things, do you use your hands a lot?"

Gon nodded, perking up a little at the fact he had something to work with.

"Alright. Try just focusing your _Nen_ into your fist, like this." Nobunaga explained, holding his hand out in front of him. Aura gathered in his palm, Gon watching while slightly enraptured. Suddenly, the aura in Nobunaga's hand dissipated and he let out a huff.

"I'm not that great at it. Uvo was more of the 'I use my fists to fight' kinda guy, and we have one other guy in the troupe who uses his fists as a weapon and is an Enhancer as well...I might call him up and ask him to help you. But for now, just try what I showed you." Nobunaga said, disappointed that his skills didn't meet up with what Gon needed.

"Alright! So you focus your aura into your fists..." Gon mumbled to himself, focusing hard on drawing the energy to his hands. Nobunaga saw a rush of energy surge into Gon's fist and felt himself pale.

"Gon, take it slow! If you bring too much energy into one place at a time it will-" Gon interrupted him with a shout as the energy that he had drawn forth became too much and backfired with an audible noise, throwing Gon backwards.

"-explode..." Nobunaga finished a little too late.

It didn't deter Gon too much, he merely stood back up with a determined shout, tried, and failed time and time again. Nobunaga felt actual pain every time Gon's energy backfired. He had tried to explain to Gon to take it slow-had even given the boy examples on how to do it-but Gon never quite got the hang of it.

Training had ended later than normal that night, Gon not wanting to listen that he should take it slow. He was breathing heavily, bruised up from being thrown around, but still satisfied that he could gather and maintain the aura in his fist for a little longer than he could when he first began.

The more Nobunaga thought on it, the better of an idea it seemed until he confronted Gon about using a weapon instead. 

"It doesn't require bringing too much energy into one place at a time, and it's easier to manage. This is something I could teach you how to do no problem, I always have my sword on me." Nobunaga said, raising his sword to Gon's level. Gon looked at it appraisingly before shaking his head.

"I'm sorry Nobunaga, I won't. I won't use a sword, or any weapon for that matter." Gon said, gently pushing down Nobunaga's hand.

Nobunaga gave him a questioning look, but put his sword down regardless.

"Gon...If you don't mind me asking you, why?" Nobunaga asked, sounding curious but none offended.

"Any damage I deal will be done on my own terms. I don't want to make a mistake by attacking the wrong person and causing someone unnecessary pain. If I had a weapon like a gun or even a sword I could make a mistake. I could fire at the wrong person, swing my sword a little too far and cut through one too many people...I don't want to risk it. I don't want to hurt people, but because of the troupe I have to." Gon explained, his eyes firm.

Nobunaga felt a flash of guilt. He hadn't really thought about what Gon would have wanted when he forced the boy to join, he didn't expect Gon to be so...kind hearted. He sensed a beast inside of Gon, the same beast that was inside Uvogin, but Gon seemed to be afraid of that beast. Uvogin accepted himself completely, even the darker parts of himself. He wasn't afraid to _cause_ pain if it meant he could protect his friends and family, but Gon was just a little different. Gon wasn't afraid to _take_ pain in order to protect his friends. Sure, if push came to shove Gon would attack with the intent to kill, but Nobunaga knew now what set him and Uvo apart.

"...I'm sorry, kid." Nobunaga said so quietly that even Gon's trained ears didn't hear him.

They both remained in silence, staring at the fire in the middle of their makeshift camp until it came time for them to rest.

*

A few days later Phinks arrived, looking irritated beyond belief and slightly exasperated.

"Nobunaga, what the hell? I got the call and thought someone was in deep trouble..." Phinks grumbled.

"Ah, Phinks! I need your help training Gon." Nobunaga said, standing up from in front of the dying fire.

"What can I do?" Phinks asked, sounding less angry now that he knew he was needed.

"Gon and I share the same _Nen_ type, but he focuses on his fists rather than enhancing his strength to use a weapon. I can't really help him there as every time I try teaching him how to build up energy in his fist, it ends up backfiring on him...Can you help him with that?" Nobunaga asked.

"Doesn't sound too hard...Alright. Where is he?" Phinks asked, looking around the camp site but not seeing Gon anywhere.

"He went exploring around a bit. I found out the way to get through to the kid was to trust him, so I'm letting him have free reign. He still knows that he can't step out of line, but it's a shit ton easier dealing with him if he trusts you in return." Nobunaga said, motioning to a log bench for Phinks to sit down on. Both men spent the time talking until Gon came back to camp.

*

"Alright, Gon. This is Phinks, he's going to try and teach you to build up your aura in your fists. Phinks is also an Enhancer, except he uses his fists as a weapon more than I do. I'll still be around while he teaches you, so if you have questions come and see me." Nobunaga said, waving slightly as he began walking into the foliage surrounding them.

Gon turned to look at the larger male, who nodded in his direction before beckoning Gon to follow him.

Phinks took it slow on Gon, teaching him to _slowly_ , **_very slowly_** draw the energy he needed into his fist, explaining everything to him while doing so. When Gon began to rush and drew too much energy at a time, Phinks would smack him upside the head as a reminder. It worked surprisingly well, as Phinks was none too gentle with Gon.

*

A few weeks passed doing this type of training, and Gon could successfully draw the energy he needed into his fists without it backfiring on to him.

"Where are you going to go from here? This isn't a true _Hatsu_ technique, you need to try expanding on it some more." Phinks said to him one morning.

Gon frowned, not knowing where he _could_ go with it.

"It's my hands, so can't I just use it to punch things with?" Gon asked. A heavy sigh fell from Phinks' lips.

"I used the same technique while training myself, but I wouldn't use something as basic as this to attack someone. It's too easy to see, let alone block. I added a spin and a grabbing motion to my attack, which makes it incredibly easy and fast to break someones neck in a fight." Phinks told Gon.

Gon didn't like the idea of attacking people still, but put his unease in the back of his mind.

"Well, I guess something I like doing with my hands would be...Argh! I don't know!" Gon shouted, holding his head in frustration.

"Rock, Paper, Scissors perhaps?" Mused Nobunaga. Gon looked up to see the older male sitting in a tree above them, not realizing that he had been there.

"That's true..." Gon contemplated.

"We don't have that long to work on that technique, we need to leave in 3 days time." Phinks reminded Gon.

Gon suddenly perked up.

"Leaving? Where are we going? To a different part of the mountain?" Gon asked, excited to be moving around.

"No, not the mountain. We're leaving the mountain and heading back." Nobunaga said, explaining for Phinks.

"Back? Back where?" Gon asked.

"We're going back to meet up with Feitan and your friend, the Zoldyck." Phinks said.

Gon shout of joy caused several flocks of birds to startle and take flight, but no one was really concerned about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [It's a remix, but here's the song!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hCcCESUPYwY)


	5. Sleepwalking

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translations for Feitan will be at the end of the chapter :) 
> 
> ((Feitan speaks Chinese in this chapter because I headcanon that when he gets comfortable around people or when he is tired he begins speaking inverted Japanese or Chinese))

From the very moment Killua left the tattoo parlor, he knew shit was going to hit the fan sooner rather than later.

"You can let go of me, idiot!" Killua growled, shrugging his arm so as to make Feitan let go of the collar of his shirt. Feitan didn't let go but instead only tightened his grip and began walking faster, almost dragging Killua with him.

Killua grumbled and tried swatting at Feitan hand every now and then, but Feitan would only dodge and cuff him on the back of the head while insulting Killua under his breath.

_"...Fènnù de māo..."_

" _Ha?_ What are you saying? What language is that even, Chinese?" Killua asked irately.

"Yes, now shut up. We have a ways to go before we get to where I'll train you." Feitan responded quickly, once again quickening his pace.

"Where-"

"If you ask me where we are going," Feitan growled "I will not hesitate to gag you for the rest of the trip."

Killua pouted angrily, but knew Feitan well enough already to know that he would hold true to his words. Despite what Killua wanted to say, he remained silent for the next few hours.

*

"We're here." Feitan said after what felt like an eternity. He and Killua had stayed silent for a majority of the trip, with Feitan only speaking to ask for tickets on a train.

"Well Tiny Tim, where'd you take me? This place looks kinda familiar..." Killua asked, stretching after spending numerous hours on a train sitting in silence. Killua noted that it was probably around 3 or 4 in the morning, the sky a dark violet with a spattering of stars beginning to disappear. The area they were in was run down, appearing to be the ruins of what once was a city.

"Don't call me that. We're on the outskirts of Yorknew City. We're back to where we once began." Feitan answered, heading inside the closest building.

"W-wait, what? Why are we back here?! And where's everyone else? Wasn't this your base of operation?" Killua asked in a rush, earning a hard stare from Feitan.

"We're back because I need to train you."

_'No shit.'_ Killua thought dryly.

"This place is hardly visited and offers us cover. Everyone already went their separate ways, and we have no set base of operations. You might call Meteor City our base of operations, but you would still be wrong." Feitan answered without turning back.

"Now, no more questions. I need you to show me what you've got for skills." Feitan beckoned Killua to follow by crooking his finger in a 'come hither' motion.

It really pissed Killua off, if he was honest.

*

Killua was just about gasping for air, having mock fought with Feitan for the past few hours without a break. He had yet to land a single hit on the smaller male, but had sustained multiple cuts and scratches on his own body due to careless mistakes that Feitan had exploited.

"Try harder, Zoldyck." Feitan said.

Killua growled low in his throat and sharpened his nails before darting at Feitan and swiping his hand in a claw-like fashion at him. Feitan easily dodged and swatted Killua on the back of the head, sending him face first to the ground.

"Damn it!" Killua hissed before crouching and looking at Feitan. Though he couldn't see the lower half of Feitan's face, Killua could see the amusement in his eyes.

"Haven't you learned anything about what my skills are yet?!" Killua asked while he once again tried clawing at Feitan, who in turn dodged effortlessly.

"Yes, your skills are..." Feitan began, but Killua threw a punch directly at his face. Feitan caught Killua's wrist and punched him in kind before finishing his sentence. "...Non-existent at the moment. You move too much, you give away where you are going to strike." Feitan said before dropping Killua's wrist.

"What type of _Nen_ do you use?" Feitan asked.

"Transmutation." Killua responded tartly as he rubbed his bruised cheek.

"Perfect. Have you tried forming your _Hatsu_ yet?" Feitan inquired, looking down on Killua who had sat on the floor cross legged.

"My _Hatsu_? I mean, I've thought about it and I know what I want to do with it, but I hadn't had a chance to practice yet." Killua answered from the floor.

"Do you need anything to help you form it?"

"Yeah, a taser."

Feitan quirked an eyebrow in mild amusement, but said nothing of it as he began to leave the room. He paused for a second in the doorway, hand lightly resting on the wall.

"Rest for now. I'll get you a taser. Form your _Hatsu_ , then use it on me in a weeks time." He said before he left the room.

"...A week!!??"

*

The week went by faster than Killua had hoped. Feitan had stayed around at the beginning, offering his input every now and then, but he left Killua alone for the most part.

_'He probably only stayed at the beginning to watch me taser myself...'_ Killua thought with an audible snort. He hadn't had much of a reaction to tasering himself, mostly due to his past, but Killua hadn't missed how Feitan looked almost disappointed when he didn't react to the pain.

Killua had improved more than he thought he could have in a week. He could transform his aura into electricity if he focused it into his fingers at first, then let it spread throughout his body.

' _But it still isn't enough to beat him..._ ' Killua huffed, realizing that Feitan's power still far exceeded his own.

"Time is up."

Killua's head jerked up, only to see Feitan standing at the top of the stone stairs in the far corner of the room.

"Not yet! I still need to-" Feitan interrupted him, beginning to descend down the stairwell.

"I gave you a week, so show me what that week has done for you. Now..." Feitan reached the last stair, and Killua could see his aura pouring off of him in waves. "Show me what you have learned. I will not hold back."

*

' _It hurts. It_ hurts _. I don't want to do this anymore!_ ' Killua had managed to do very little damage to Feitan, his _Hatsu_ wasn't strong enough to do any more than lightly zap Feitan.

_"Run."_

"Damn it!" Killua shouted in frustration, already hearing Illumi's warnings in his head.

"Is that all you have?" Feitan asked tauntingly, dodging another one of Killua's weak attempts at injuring him.

"Should I give you a real reason to fight back? How abou-" Feitan let out a strangled cry as Killua managed to break his arm by using the weak point he spotted while Feitan was talking.

_"Run. Hurry."_

"...Let this be your reason to fight me for real. Pain Packer:" Feitan started saying. Killua felt as if all the air in the room was being sucked out, sweat breaking out on his skin. A small ball of light was beginning to form in the center of the room, sucking bits of rocks and debris into it as it began to grow. An immense heat filled the room as the light began shining so brightly Killua could no longer look at it.

_'W-what is that?!? Is that...His Hatsu?!'_ Killua thought, panic filling him as the light grew larger.

_"Run. If you aren't certain you can win,_ run _."_

_'I don't...I don't know what that is! I need to-I-I need to get away!'_

_"When you know nothing of your opponent.._.run away _."_

' _No! Not now! Damn it...'_ Illumi's words echoed inside of his head, his swirling eyes appearing in Killua's mind.

"...Rising Sun." Feitan said, the light finally growing big enough that it was larger than Killua.

"What destructive power!" Killua whispered, unable to move as fear ran rampant in his body. He began noticing that the building was caving in on itself from the pressure of the light Feitan had brought about, every bit of the ceiling that fell into the light only serving to continue its growth.

_"Run._ Now _."_

For the first time in Killua's life, he had never took his brother's advice to heart like he did then, forcing what little electricity that was running through his body into his feet. Killua took off faster than a lightning bolt, not noticing that the light Feitan had created began to decrease in size.

Killua didn't look back, hearing the building crash and crumble to pieces as it finally imploded. He continued running until his _Hatsu_ ran out, his breathing labored and lungs aching just as much as his legs were. He collapsed where he stood, finally understanding just how much danger he had been in.

_"He would have killed you, Kil. Good job running away."_

Rather than feeling safe, Killua just felt ashamed at his own weakness.

*

"So here's where you ran off." Killua awoke with a jolt, his face pressed into the dirt.

Feitan stood before him, his left arm in a sling. He didn't look too pleased and Killua felt the fear from before rush back to him. Feitan didn't say anything as he turned and began walking once again. Killua didn't need to be told to follow.

*

"That's what your _Hatsu_ could turn into once you hone it, you know."

Killua once again jolted when Feitan spoke, nearly wincing at his timidness and fear around the male.

"You seem to have a good basis for it already. Work on turning that into a weapon, preferably long range since you get scared so easily." Killua flinched at Feitan's words, but didn't have the spark in him to retaliate and say that that wasn't true.

"The way you quickly transferred your _Hatsu_ into your feet to aid in your escape was good thinking, though. I suppose it is only right to run away from an attack like that-I really could have killed you."

_'I know...'_ Killua thought, a shiver running through his body.

"What...Do you mean by ' _could have_ '? Are you saying that you _wouldn't_ of killed me?" Killua asked, proud of himself for keeping his voice level.

"...I listen to Danchou's rules. 'No serious fights between Spiders' is one rule I won't ever break. I couldn't have brought myself to kill you regardless of how angry I was." Feitan answered after a moment.

"I honestly thought you were going to burn me to ashes." Killua said softly.

"I wouldn't have. You are my student, and I am your mentor regardless of how little we both like the situation. I needed to teach you real fear when facing an opponent on an entirely different level from you." Killua didn't feel the need to mention that he already knew what that was like because of Illumi, so he nodded regardless.

No words were exchanged for a while, and Killua began willing himself to get out of his self defensive mode he had worked himself into.

_'Feitan won't hurt you, he can't hurt you...You don't need to run...How odd,'_ Killua thought to himself, chagrin flooding him. _'I'm telling myself that I don't need to run, when all I could think of a few weeks ago was running away as far as possible with Gon. Maybe I'm getting used to him? He doesn't seem_ that bad _other than having a short temper and a poor sense of humor...'_

"We will begin working on other things now that you have a basic _Hatsu_. I will teach you to extract information when we get back." Feitan said suddenly, bringing Killua out of his thoughts.

Killua felt his heart stop beating for a moment.

_'I spoke too soon.'_

*

"Stop it! Please, I'll do anything!" The man in the chair screamed, begging as Feitan ripped off another finger.

Feitan stood up from his kneeling position, looking at Killua as if to make sure his eyes were still on the demonstration in front of him.

"Now you can ask him anything. He'd better tell the truth if he knew what was good for him." Feitan said, casting the man sitting in the chair a disdainful look.

"Is there...Even anything you wanted to know from this guy?" Killua asked hesitantly.

"No. I have no idea who he is." Feitan gave a half-hearted shrug as he began walking away from the man. Killua felt a wave of sickness take over him suddenly.

"So this guy could be innocent, and yet you brought him here to torture?!" Killua asked before he could stop himself.

Feitan cast him a sidelong look, sighing heavily before walking towards Killua.

"Listen, Zoldyck. I said I don't know _who_ he is, not _what_  he is. I know he's a scumbag. A lowlife that serves no real purpose in life other than to cause misfortune to others." Feitan seemingly hesitated before continuing to speak. "The Troupe may still seem like a bunch of murderers to you, but we only kill those that deserve it or those that get in the way. If we kill someone completely innocent, it is to set an example. There is no one here to set an example to, so I wouldn't torture an innocent." Feitan pulled away at the end of his speech, taking a few steps away from Killua.

The man was still crying in the chair, blood flowing heavily from the stumps where his fingers used to be. Killua glanced over at him, still feeling uneasy.

"So if there isn't anything you need to ask him, can we let him go?" Killua asked. the man let out a sharp cry at his words and began shouting.

"L-listen to him! He seems to know what he's doing, he-" Feitan threw his sword directly at the man, spearing his chest and cutting of his tirade of words.

Killua saw that coming from a mile away, Feitan hated it when people thought his judgement wasn't the best.

Feitan said nothing as he pulled the sword free from the man's body, wiping the blade clean on the man's shirt.

"Hey...I'll do anything you ask of me, alright? Just...Just pick people who are criminals or something, not just random people off of the street. I'll only work with you if the people I need to hurt are already guilty of a crime and can't be redeemed." Killua said firmly, still not wanting to hurt anyone but knowing _that_ would be impossible with him being in the troupe.

"That is fair." Feitan said, agreeing with no difficulty. "I will start bringing criminals in soon enough, start thinking of information you want to get from them. Start small. Then, start thinking of questions you can find the answer for to see if they are telling the truth."

Killua had a long ways to go ahead of him, he could already tell.

*

“Killua, that’s good.” Feitan said, causing Killua to raise an eyebrow.

_Killua_ , not Zoldyck.

“We got the information we wanted from him, now…We can kill him or let him go.”

“Whatever we do to him is your choice, _I’m_ not going to kill him.” Killua said, shoving his bloody hands in his pockets before he left the room.

He tried to ignore the shiver that ran down his body at the sound of the man’s screams, consoled only by the fact that the man was actually a terrible person to begin with.

*

Feitan emerged from the room, wiping his dirtied hands on a wet towel which he soon dropped to the floor.

“How long are you going to keep that thing in your forehead?” Feitan asked, dropping heavily on to a chair near where Killua sat.

“Hm? What did you say?” Killua asked, removing a singular earbud so he could hear Feitan. He had picked up the music device a while back, wanting something to pass the time and help him relax when Feitan let him off the hook from training. He had learned the hard way what happens when he doesn’t listen to what Feitan has to say, keeping his volume on low most of the time to be able to hear what’s going on around him.

“ _Báichī_ , I asked how long _that_ -” Feitan pointed to the upper center of his own forehead “-was going to remain in your forehead. You do stupid things because of it, you know.”

Killua raised his hand in a ‘what-do-you-mean’ motion, not having any idea what Feitan was talking about.

Feitan sighed heavily before he leaned forward in his own chair, reaching one of his now clean hands out towards Killua’s head.

Killua leaned back out of reflex, giving Feitan a strange look.

“Are you saying there’s something on my forehead?” Killua asked while using the back of his hand to scrub at his forehead.

“Not on, in. As in, inside. Give me your hand.” Feitan said, no doubt an order and not a suggestion.

Killua caved and hesitantly handed Feitan his hand, who then raised both of their hands only to press Killua’s thumb and forefinger against the very center of his forehead.

“…There. Now pull it yourself.” Feitan ordered after removing his hand.

Killua experimentally pulled where Feitan had pinched his fingers together, not expecting anything to happen. A sharp, pained noise drew forth from his lips as he removed his hand and ran to the bathroom in the abandoned building to look in a filthy mirror to see just what was in his forehead.

“I don’t…I don’t see anything at all…” Killua murmured, irate.

“Use _Gyo_. It’s faint and very well hidden, but it’s there. Whoever put it there must be a pro at sleight of hand and being sly.” Feitan said from the doorway having followed Killua.

“That could be literally anyone in my family…” Killua grumbled, clearly perturbed at the fact that something-something he couldn’t clearly see-was inside of his head of all places.

‘ _Gyo_.’ After activating _Gyo_ , Killua noted that something emitted a soft light from his forehead near his hairline, indicating that _Nen_ was in use.

“I just thought to point it out. Take it out if you want, I don’t care. Unless you make a fatal mistake due to it, I will not interfere. _Wăn’ān_ , Killua. Be ready early tomorrow, we’re heading back. We will meet up with Nobunaga and your little friend, along with Franklin and Phinks.” Feitan didn’t miss how Killua’s face lit up at the prospect of being able to see Gon again after so long. A light laugh escaped Feitan, muffled by his clothes.

“Good night, Feitan!” Killua said quickly, rushing by him to head to his own room to begin packing what little he had amassed during his months with Feitan.

The use of his actual name and not some insult directed at his height created on the spot by Killua didn’t go unnoticed by Feitan.

*

After the incident with Feitan there were no more that followed. Killua had taken around a month to not cringe whenever Feitan was nearby, and had actually began to get...comfortable, if you will, near him. Instead of having uncomfortable or even hostile silences with Feitan, they became more _relaxed_.

Killua had figured out that Feitan had a short temper ( _'Even shorter than his stature'_ Killua would oft times think with a snicker), and was informed that the basis behind Feitan's _Hatsu_ was due to his anger. He had to be angry in order to activate his _Hatsu_ , which was the cost of his ability.

Killua had improved upon his own _Hatsu_ during the rest of his time there and was more than excited to finally get the chance to show Gon.

"Hey Feitan." Killua called out, catching Feitan's attention.

"When and where are we meeting up with the others?" Killua asked, getting impatient in his desire to see Gon after over a month.

"Whenever we arrive at our destination you will see the others." Feitan said, avoiding actually answering Killua's question.

Killua frowned, but he was used to Feitan's cryptic answers by this point.

*

"Killua!" Killua's head jerked up only to see Gon running full speed at him. Unable to brace himself completely before Gon made impact, Killua stood still and just let it happen. He heard laughter other than Gon's as they both fell down in a heap with Gon giggling madly in his ear.

"I missed you Killua! How did your training go?" Gon asked cheerfully, moving himself off of Killua before helping him up as well.

"Pretty good. How was your training?" Killua asked, more than excited to finally see Gon again after so long.

"It started off really bad, but it got better! I'm probably good enough to kick your butt with my eyes closed now!" Gon taunted with a grin.

"You two can spar later, we have a mission we need to do soon." A firm voice said. Killua looked up to see a tall man in a green track suit staring at them.

"Gon, who's that?" Killua asked, pointing at the blond man.

"That's Phinks, he helped me with my _Hatsu_." Gon replied.

"Alright you two." Feitan caught the boys attention. Killua recognized Feitan's 'Authoritative' voice and nudged Gon to be quiet and listen.

"As Phinks said: we have a mission. Time to put those skills you just learned to good use. Oh, and if you fail...It could result in your immediate death." Feitan finished, sounding almost pleasant.

_'Well then.'_ Gon and Killua collectively thought, sweat-dropping.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fènnù de māo-Angry cat
> 
> Báichī-Idiot/Moron
> 
> Wăn’ān-Good night
> 
> (I thought it would be important to have someone at least point out that a needle was in Killua's head at this point, but not take it out for him. That was a major part of him developing in the series, and I at least wanted to keep it canon that he removes it himself (which he may or may not do within the span of this AU))
> 
> [This is the song :)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lyaa4HEG_vI)


	6. Professional Griefers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: surgery that is unprofessional and done in a kitchen on the floor

"Alright, here's how it's going to go. Feitan, you'll be with Gon. Killua, you're with Franklin. Gon and Feitan are doing recon, they are going to get the layout of the building and an estimate of how many people are inside. One problem may arise, they have a Specialist working for them and he's incredibly strong. If you encounter him, run. This is the only reason you may die on this mission, and I will repeat this: Do not engage the Specialist inside this building. Are we clear?" Phinks asked.

Everyone nodded, but Gon and Killua were a bit confused as to why this was happening so quickly. Faster than they had gotten together, Gon and Killua were once again split up and placed with the person they were assigned to work with.

 *

“Gon. Take this mission seriously. If he attacks, leave immediately because I won’t save you.” Feitan said, patting Gon’s shoulder.

Gon merely nodded, his eyes hard. He knew full well that as a newer member of the troupe he didn’t have their full trust yet and wouldn’t be treated like the others were, including when it came to combat.

“We just came for recon, so gather as much information as you can and as quietly as you can. Killua and Franklin will come in to take care of the others in an hour, but Danchou wants to know the inside layout and information in case things go sour.” Feitan murmured softly as he pressed his back to a wall and glanced around it.

“Alright.”

“Gon…Tell me what you are doing.” Feitan ordered, his eyes sliding towards Gon’s face.

“Collecting information for recon.” Gon answered obediently, his teeth clenched.

“And?” Feitan prompted.

“And I will not engage the man inside at any costs. If I do, you will leave me behind and escape alone.” Gon said. Feitan nodded in approval and began to once again advance forward.

Feitan thought Gon understood.

He didn’t.

*

Killua felt waves of electricity sparking off of him, his hair standing on end from the currents running through his veins.He slipped off of his position on Franklin's shoulder. Franklin was standing behind him, anger rolling off of him in palpable waves, but he remained still; watching the scene unfold in front of him.

No one got away with hurting Gon.

Not even his mentor, whom he had finally, _finally_ began to sort of trust after all this time.

“Godspeed.” Killua murmured, eyes narrowed and zeroing in on the man who held Gon’s limp body in his hands.

Killua noticed blood falling from a gash on Gon’s head, watched as the drips descended down the side of Gon’s face, and darted forward before the first drop could hit the ground.

Feitan dodged, a slight noise of displeasure leaving his lips as he tried not to jostle Gon’s body too much. As fast as Killua was throwing punches and kicks, Feitan was parrying them with just as much dexterity. He had shifted Gon under his left arm as he blocked with his right, being careful not to press too hard against Gon’s ribs (which he knew at least 3 to be broken and several more to be fractured).

“Stop it, I didn-“ A solid uppercut to his jaw had him biting his words off, and nearly his tongue.

“You have his blood on your hands! How long did you beat him until he became like this? An hour? More? This wasn’t even a mission for you, was it? You just wanted to kill him!” Killua rushed, accentuating each question with a sharp jab at Feitan’s sides which he barely managed to avoid.

“Franklin, no.” Feitan growled, his eyes lingering on the behemoth of a man behind Killua who had hesitantly raised his hands and was pointing his Double Machine Gun at Killua. Feitan felt slightly perturbed at the fact that Franklin was hesitating: it wasn’t something he did often; even if it came to a brawl between Spiders he never hesitated. Franklin always, always went for the kill.

 _‘What an impact these kids have had on us all…_ ’ Feitan thought, mindlessly dodging another close call hit from Killua.

“Killua.” Feitan drawled, thinking of no other way to stop the boy from rampaging than to throw his friend’s mutilated body at him.

*

Killua shouted in surprise as Feitan launched Gon at him more gently than he would have expected. Feitan turned and began walking as Killua cradled Gon’s body, hearing the soft pleas for Gon to be okay, for him to be alive, for anything.

“Take him to the hospital…He’ll be fine. But do it quickly.” Feitan said without looking back, reaching Franklin’s side in a mere moment.

Franklin and Feitan had an unspoken agreement as they both turned to leave, Franklin’s gaze lingering on Gon’s battered form.

Killua felt his anger reignite at the casualness of Feitan’s tone, but Hisoka’s warning sounded in his mind, reminding him to be careful.

_“Remember, Killua Zoldyck: You chose to be here of your own free will ♣. Any misbehaving you do will have dire consequences for your dear friend…”_

“Damn it!” Killua hissed as he watched Franklin and Feitan’s retreating forms. “Hang on Gon, I’ll get you to a hospital soon…”

*

“Help him! Please help him!” Killua was near tears, having several doctors already refuse to look at Gon simply because his tattoo was in plain sight for everyone to see.

“We don’t help his kind here. Try somewhere else, and fast. He’s on the doorstep of death as is.” The security guard speaking to Killua had been called over the moment the lady at the desk saw Gon’s tattoo, standing stark against the pallor flesh of his arm.

Killua cursed as he fled the waiting room of yet another small town clinic, tears pricking his eyes. It didn’t matter how fast he ran, Killua couldn’t outrun the brevity at which Gon’s end was approaching.

 _‘I’ll just try the next town! I can get there before-before he…’_ Killua couldn’t bring himself to even think of Gon dying.

“Killua?!”

Killua felt his heart nearly stop at the familiar voice that called out to him, turning quickly on his heel only to see Kurapika staring in disbelief at him. A soft smiled crossed Kurapika’s face before his eyes flicked downwards only to see Gon’s limp body in his arms.

“Gon’s…H-he’s gonna…die, Pika. No one will help him! I-I’ve tried so many towns, so many clinics…His breathing has slowed so much from when Feitan first threw him at me, now…” Killua trailed off, tears rolling down his cheeks while he choked back sobs.

“Leorio.”

“W-what?” Killua asked, trying his best to stop his shoulders from shaking.

“Leorio is with me, we have an apartment we’re renting for a few weeks nearby. Leorio will help.” Kurapika said, his eyes burning a fierce red as his gaze remained on Gon.

“Follow me.” Kurapika turned and began sprinting towards a high rising complex not too far from where they were. Despite his aching lungs and legs, Killua followed; easily matching Kurapika’s pace.

*

“Leorio! Help!” Kurapika shouted the moment he unlocked the front door. Leorio poked his head out from the kitchen with an eyebrow raised, his tie loosened but still around his neck.

“Pika? Why are you yelling, that isn’t like y-Is that Gon?!” Leorio all but shoved Kurapika out of the way, lifting Gon from Killua’s hands as gently as he could.

“Why is he like this?! Never mind, he needs help immediately! Killua, why didn’t you take him to a doctor?!?” Leorio growled, not frustrated at Killua but at the situation as a whole.

“No one would take him because of his tattoo…” Killua wheezed out, leaning heavily against the doorframe while praying Kurapika didn’t hear him.

“His tattoo? All because of a tattoo no one would-“ Leorio cut himself off as his eyes landed on the pitch black spider with a solid red 3 sitting in the middle of it.

“Has Kurapika seen it yet?” Leorio whispered while subtly shifting Gon’s arm so it remained hidden from Kurapika’s sight. Killua shook his head no, his breathing still slightly labored.

“Let’s…Keep it that way.” Leorio murmured, locking eyes with Killua, his gaze uncharacteristically intense.

“Kurapika! Grab my briefcase from my room and bring it to the kitchen! Killua, head into the bathroom, first door on the left. Grab all the towels and washcloths that you can find, and if you could fill a bowl with hot water that would be great.” Leorio asked, his face composed.

Killua nodded and bolted to the bathroom as Leorio stood up with Gon cradled in his arms, blood still sluggishly dripping from his mouth and from the gash on his head. Kurapika nodded to him as they crossed paths, but neither had the strength to say anything.

As Killua came back into the kitchen and handed Leorio the towels and washcloths, he saw all of the sharp instruments lying on the floor in a neat pile. Killua’s eyes flickered up to meet Kurapika’s and wasn’t surprised to find that his eyes were still red.

Killua couldn’t bear to watch Leorio cut Gon up even more so than he already was just to fix him, so he left the room.

It was going to be a long night.

*

It turned out to be a long morning as well.

Leorio had limited supplies as he wasn’t in a proper place to be doing microsurgery or bone fracture repair, but he did have patience. Kurapika ended up being the one to keep track of Gon’s vitals for most of the night, but after Gon had been stitched up from the worst of it Killua took over for him so he could rest as well.

Over the course of the next 13 hours only a few words were said between them all, Leorio being the only one to talk and ask for another tool to be handed to him every now and then. There had been a brief panic when Leorio realized he had nothing to cauterize Gon’s wounds with, but quickly devised a plan to use his own knife after sterilizing it and heating it up with his lighter.

After Leorio had finished, it took everyone a few more minutes to realize that it was alright, that Gon was…stable.

“Leorio, what was wrong with Gon’s arm?” Kurapika finally broke the silence, motioning to the bandage wrapped around Gon’s left wrist.

“A-ah, he-h-his wrist was sliced up a bit, but it isn’t anything to worry about.” Leorio said, hoping his cover story would work out for everyone’s sake.

Kurapika bought into his lie easily enough, but turned to Killua.

“Killua, what happened…? Why was Gon beaten so badly, and why would no one help you?” Kurapika asked, his eyes still faintly glowing in the early morning light.

Killua felt a cold sweat form over his body, trying to think his way out of the situation as fast as he could.

“I-It’s been a really long day…Can I tell you guys later? Like when Gon wakes up?” Killua asked, all but pleading and praying that Kurapika would let it slide.

Kurapika looked at him appraisingly and hesitated before nodding and letting out a jaw cracking yawn.

“It has been a long day…Especially for you, Leorio. We all need to get some sleep, but someone needs to stay awake with Gon to make sure he stays stable.”

Killua immediately raised his hand, saying “I’ll do it. I can stay with him for now, then we can take shifts watching him until he wakes up.”

“Sounds good to me.” Leorio said, standing up to crack his back after being hunched over for so long.

“I’m going to take a shower first though…I’m. Kind of covered in blood.” Leorio said, glancing down at his soiled hands and stained shirt. Kurapika nodded and agreed to take the next shift while Leorio showered and slept. Each boy in turn bade the others good night and went their separate ways. As Leorio finally got to removing his shirt on his way to the bathroom, a hand on his wrist stopped him from going any further.

“Ha? Killua? What’s wrong?” Leorio asked, his eyes soft but tired looking.

“I just…Thanks. For, y’know…Everything. For not telling Kurapika, for saving Gon…I owe you. I really, really do.” Killua said, unable to meet the taller boy’s eyes.

A soft smile crossed Leorio’s face as he turned and ruffled Killua’s hair with his cleaner hand (hastily wiped on his now ruined shirt, no doubt).

“You guys mean a lot to me, and besides: that’s what friends are for. We cover for each other, we help each other out…I’ll always be there for you, Gon, and Kurapika no matter what. Remember that Killua.” Leorio grinned as he turned to once again head towards the bathroom, but was once again stopped as Killua lightly wrapped his arms around Leorio’s waist.

“…But seriously, Old Man. Thanks.”

By the time Leorio turned around again, Killua was no longer in the hallway.

*

What Killua thinks is only a few minutes of staring at Gon ends up being around 5 hours. Kurapika is already awake and ready to take over for Killua, managing to get a little food into both of them before he all but throws Killua out of the kitchen. He hadn’t wanted to leave Gon’s side, but Kurapika out of all of them knows how dangerous an unhealthy obsession can be and put a stop to Killua’s behavior.

Killua curled up on the guest bed that Kurapika had slept in not too long ago, but he couldn’t bring himself to sleep. Every noise had him on edge: Leorio snoring in the room next door, the drip of a faucet in the bathroom, the sounds of Kurapika walking around in the kitchen every now and then…

Paranoia was taking its toll.

_‘What if that isn’t Kurapika walking, but Feitan? What if…What if he’s tracked us down and is going to finish Gon off? What if Kurapika gets curious and checks out Gon’s wrist?!’_

“Killua…you’re thinking too loud. Just get some rest.” A gruff voice heavily laced with sleep said from the doorway.

Killua sat up and rolled his eyes at Leorio, who in turned chuckled as he walked through the doorway and sat on the end of the bed.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Leorio offered. Killua shook his head no, knowing that Leorio would understand.

“Alright. I’ll be in the kitchen with Pika and Gon. I need to get some food in me; my stomach actually woke me up.” Leorio said with a laugh. Killua noted that he looked better despite having such a little amount of sleep. He no longer had blood soaked hands and dark marks around his eyes, but he still looked…tired.

 _‘Almost older, if that’s possible.’_ Killua mentally snorted at his jab at Leorio’s age.

“Get some more sleep when you can, you worked hard to save him.” Killua said instead, deciding that annoying the older teen wasn’t in his best interest at the moment.

“Yes, mother…” Leorio joked, lightly nudging Killua’s shoulder with his own before standing up and leaving the door cracked open on his way out.

 _‘If I were to have an ideal older brother…Leorio wouldn’t be so bad.’_ Killua thought with a small smile.

Killua didn’t even have time to lay back down before he heard excited talking in the hallway and then a voice outside his door.

“Killua! He’s awake!” Kurapika said exuberantly as he pushed the wooden door open.

“Already?!” Killua jumped out of bed, forgoing putting on a shirt as he slipped past Kurapika and ran to the kitchen.

Gon looked awful, the stitches on his sides standing out as dark red lines crisscrossing his chest. His eyes looked bruised, his lip was split, and his hair was in more disarray than normal with some strands framing and sticking to his forehead, still matted with blood in some places.

But he was still alive.

“Hey…” Gon said, managing a weak smile as Leorio helped him sit up straight. Killua noted Gon wincing as his stitches began to pull, but couldn’t help the surge of anger that flooded through him.

“Why…?” Killua whispered, his hair covering his eyes.

“Why what, Killua?” Kurapika asked, looking concerned.

“Why did you take Feitan on?! You should have ran, idiot!” Killua growled.

“Hey now, Gon just woke up give him a br-“ Leorio was interrupted as Killua began talking over him at the exact same time Kurapika realized who Feitan was.

“I’m not mad at Gon, I’m mad at Feitan!”

“Feitan?! As in Feitan from the troupe?!!”

“Guys! Guys, everyone calm down, we don’t want to agitate Gon any more than we already ha-“

“Be quiet!” Gon shouted hoarsely, stopping everyone from talking over the others.

“Killua, I know you’re angry but what are you talking about?! I never took on Feitan, he was trying to help me. I…didn’t listen to him. I wasn’t following orders.” Gon said softly, distress flitting across his features.

“He…Didn’t attack you? But I saws him call you an idiot while carelessly picking you up as if he had done this,” Killua motioned to Gon’s wounds “to you.”

“It was our target. He saw us and charged…And I disobeyed Feitan’s orders and fought back. Feitan said he wouldn’t help me if I got into a fight, he told me to just run. He…he lost his chance to run because he didn’t listen to his own orders: he came back for me. He attacked our target and ended him so I wouldn’t be killed. He was probably injured as well, Killua. That man was strong, stronger than even Feitan I’d guess.” Gon clarified, trying to stand up despite Leorio telling him no.

“We need to leave, Killua. They could come looking for us.” Gon wheezed, gingerly holding his right side. His eyes briefly flickered to his left wrist and momentarily looked surprised at the bandage there, but said nothing of it.

“Gon, I took you really far away. I don’t think they can find us-“

“Killua, I want to talk to you alone.” Gon interrupted.

“Now wait a second, what’s going on?!” Kurapika interjected. “What’s all this about ‘them’ looking for you, and is the Feitan you were talking about the one from the troupe? And if so, why did he help you?” Kurapika’s eyes were back to being a solid red, almost pulsating with anger.

“Kurapika…I can’t tell you. I can’t involve you in this, it’s per-“

“Gon, please!” Kurapika sounded near pleading. “I found you in Killua’s arms, half dead, and it might be related to the troupe!”

“It’s personal. Please Kurapika, I don’t want to hurt you with anything Killua or I may say.” Now it was Gon’s turn to sound desperate, pain clear in his eyes.

Kurapika said nothing as he wordlessly turned and left the room, the door to the guest bedroom closing with a soft click as he went inside.

Both boys turned towards Leorio, who looked stern.

“You can force Kurapika out of here because it’s for his own good, but you can’t make me leave. Now spill,” Leorio said, looking directly at Killua. “because I’d say I earned the right to know at least why Gon has a troupe tattoo.”

“It’s…not just Gon. I have one too.” Killua said, albeit hesitantly. He turned his back to Leorio and raised the hair that rested heavily on his neck, exposing the number 7 in the middle of the spider.

“Alright.” Leorio sounded calm despite the fact that two of his best friends admitted they were part of a notorious criminal gang.

“Now Gon, why did you say that they could be coming for us? How?” Killua asked, letting his hair fall back in place.

“The Spider.” Gon’s answer was cryptic at best, but Killua immediately understood.

“Shit. Shit! I didn’t…I didn’t even consider that!” Killua said, groaning.

“What does he mean “The Spider”?” Leorio asked, confusion clear on his face.

“Our tattoos.” Killua began. “A man named Scott did them, and I guess he had done every spider’s tattoo before us. Anyone can make a tattoo like this, but _Nen_ …” Killua hesitated as he used _Gyo_ , looking at Gon’s wrist to confirm his suspicions. “… _Nen_ was infused in the ink of the tattoo. I’d take a guess that the marking on Chrollo’s forehead allows him to track every member, which would explain how he can get in contact with us all to tell us where to meet despite if we’ve gone our separate ways.” Killua finished.

“Even if the ink was removed…?” Leorio trailed off, his question going unfinished but not unanswered.

“Even if we tried to remove the ink, the _Nen_ would still be there is my guess. Damn, I never even thought of the tattoo as something to track us…” Killua huffed indignantly at the information that escaped him.

“We need to leave now, before anyone comes. I can guarantee you, if Chrollo thinks we’ve gone rouge then he will send someone after us. I don’t think he’d send Nobunaga or Feitan because they’re our mentors, but he might send Franklin or Phinks. They’re fiercely loyal to the troupe, and we’re outsiders.” Gon finished, pushing at Leorio’s chest and extending his hand to Killua.

Killua ignored the dirty look he got from Leorio as he gently helped Gon stand, placing his hand on his lower back to balance him.

A sharp knock sounded as Gon finally managed to stand upright, catching the attention of all in the room.

“I got it!” Leorio called, most likely informing Kurapika rather than the two boys in front of him.

“Gon, you sit down while I get the door. I keep thinking it’s really late, but it’s only…” Leorio glanced at the watch he donned on his wrist “It’s only like 3.” He finished, muttering to mainly himself as he reached the front door.

While Leorio answered the door, Killua helped Gon into the living room where he managed to get Gon to slowly sit down. He did so without complaint, which was a testament to how much pain he was really in.

“Uhm…K-Killua?” Leorio called for him, sounding nervous. “There’s someone who’d like to see you.”

Killua looked up sharply, his eyes narrowed as he straightened and began walking to the door. Gon suddenly reached out, catching Killua’s hand in a vice-like grip.

“I know it could be the troupe, and if it is…I’m not leaving Leorio standing at the door with them. Let go, Gon.” Killua said as he gently pried Gon’s fingers from his own.

Killua could feel his heart hammering loudly in his ears as he made his way to the foyer, but he didn’t feel like running. He felt resigned almost, accepting that this could be where he was killed.

Leorio glanced back at Killua, stepping aside so Killua could see who was at the door.

Feitan stared icily back at him, his arms crossed. No one else was with him.

“Danchou wants to see you two. I take it Gon survived?” Feitan said before inviting himself inside and pushing past Killua. Killua felt a flash of panic as he realized that Kurapika could possibly hear Feitan speaking and reached out to grab the man’s arm to prevent him from going further.

Gon made a slight noise of displeasure at the sight of Feitan, but knew better than to say anything.

“Hey…We’ll go with you, alright? Wait outside for us, we need to say our…goodbyes.” Killua said, already dragging a willing Feitan back to the door.

"You speak as though you are going to die." Feitan sounded vaguely amused, but allowed himself to be put outside of the door and into the hallway while Killua and Gon bid Leorio and Kurapika farewell.

"Kurapika! You can come out now." Leorio called to the blond. Kurapika opened the door and walked out, his face passive.

"I know you're mad at us, but I don't want to leave with things being that way..." Killua said. Kurapika seemed to deflate, and all too suddenly he looked so tired and lost.

"I'm not mad, I'm just worried...Are you both leaving now?" Kurapika asked.

Gon and Killua nodded, and Leorio embraced both boys before sending them Kurapika's way. He was a bit more tender with Gon, being careful to not hurt him any more than he already had been. Kurapika embraced them both as well, and as they were at the doorway, they heard Leorio speak up.

"Even thought it was only for one night, I'm glad we got to see you two again. Be sure to visit us soon, and next time don't wait a year to do it!" Leorio said firmly, a smile on his face. Kurapika smiled tiredly at them and nodded.

"You have our numbers, call us any time, alright?" He said.

Both boys nodded and with one last wave and smile, they headed out the door.

Feitan was waiting outside of the building for them, and brought them without a word to another hotel not too far away.

Chrollo, Phinks, Franklin and Nobunaga were waiting in the lobby inside, looking every bit as imposing as they once did to the boys.

"I have news for you two." Chrollo said.

Both boys felt as though all the air in the building had been sucked out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [This is the song for this chapter!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QJelsOHe6xk)
> 
>  
> 
> If you couldn't tell, the title for this chapter has nothing to do with the content T.T sorry but it's one of my favorite songs lmao


	7. Christmas

“You mean we’re allowed to…” Killua began, a smile growing on his face.

“We’re allowed to leave? _Yahoo_!” Gon finished for him, jumping up and grabbing Killua’s hands before spinning both of them. A shout of pain escaped Gon, who grinned sheepishly before tenderly holding his sides.

“Can we go anywhere we want?!” Both boys asked, twin smiles adorning their faces.

Chrollo laughed as he nodded his head.

“Feitan told me what a good job you did Gon. He also informed me that you were the one who took out our target, and judging by your wounds…That is believable. You’ve earned our trust, but you must come when we call for you, regardless of what you are doing at the time. Remember: The Spider comes first and foremost.” Chrollo said, getting serious again.

Both boys nodded solemnly, knowing that their ties to the troupe would never be gone completely. They might have been allowed this fleeting moment of freedom, but it was their duty to report back when needed, no matter what.

"Wait, what? I took out the target?" Gon asked, looking confused.

"According to Feitan and Franklin's report, yes. You must have passed out before you realized that you had won the fight." Chrollo confirmed.

Both boys looked at Feitan, whose gaze was currently turned away from them. A slow smile crept on Gon's face.

"I take it back, Killua." He whispered to the boy next to him.

"Hm? Take what back?"

"What I said a year ago. You have the best mentor." Gon said.

Killua smiled as Chrollo, Phinks, Nobunaga, Franklin, and finally Feitan left the building.

"Yeah, I guess I do."

*

It wasn't long before the boys found themselves on a ship headed to Whale Island. When they arrived, the entire town had a warm welcome for Gon, and Aunt Mito had an even warmer welcome for both of them.

"Gon, can you come here for a second?" Aunt Mito called from the doorway.

Gon and Killua had arrived on Whale Island about a month ago, and it was now nearing Christmas time. Gon came bounding down the stairs with Killua hot on his heels, both boys giggling like mad.

Gon saw Mito standing in the doorway, talking to someone. He couldn't see anyone past her, but he recognized the person's name when he heard it.

“Oh, Feitan! Gon’s mentioned you before, but he never told me…How did you boys meet?” Mito said with a smile, more than happy to welcome another one of Gon’s estranged friends who had arrived at the door.

“We work together sometimes.” Feitan answered, clearly not comfortable with the amount of affection being bestowed upon him by Mito who had already began trying to get him to take off his coat and come inside.

“Work? Well good for you guys! I’m glad that Gon is hanging around other boys his age, I worry he’ll fall in with the wrong sorts sometimes. You seem like a nice boy though, so I’m not worried!” Mito said as she ushered Feitan inside of the warm house.

 _“Other boys…_ ” Gon started, glancing at Killua.

 _“…His age?”_ Killua finished for him, clearly on the verge of laughter.

Feitan, however, did not look amused.

“What, did I say something funny?” Mito asked, watching the two boys shaking with mirth in front of her.

“Aunt Mito, Feitan is older than we are.” Gon said, trying to compose himself lest he irritate Feitan further than he already was.

“Oh? Is he as old as your friend Leorio? I know you said Leorio was around 18 to 19 the last time we talked about him.” Mito asked, trying to figure out what was so funny about Feitan’s age.

“Twenty-six…” Feitan murmured from behind her, refusing to remove his soaked jacket.

“Hm? What did you say dear?” Mito prompted.

“I’m twenty-six, Ms. Freecs.” Feitan repeated. If Killua didn’t know any better, he would have thought he caught an embarrassed flush on Feitan’s cheeks.

“…Oh. Oh! I’m so sorry! I just figured because you were around the same height-I-I need to go check on the food…” Mito said, clearly wishing to escape the conversation by any means necessary.

“He’s so short he needs a ladder to reach manhood!” Killua whispered to Gon who laughed loudly, earning a dirty look from Feitan.

“Go sit by the fire and dry off if you won’t take off your jacket.” Gon said after recovering from his laughing fit, pointing to a room that was cascaded by flickering lights.

*

Mito was the type to go all out for Christmas, and had no issues taking Gon and his friends in on such short notice. A tree was up in the corner of the living room, some presents underneath it already. Lights twinkled, twined around the tree, and an angel was glowing softly at the top in place of a star.

“So Feitan…” Killua began, taking a seat in the middle of the couch while Gon perched on the armrest closest to him. “What brings you here?”

“Danchou sent me to make sure you two knew what the call was like. For Gon, it should be easy enough to notice the call…But for Killua, who got his tattoo in an obscure place where even he can’t see it, it will be harder.” Feitan said, sitting in between Gon and Killua.

“What’s the call like?” Gon asked, swinging his feet and lightly hitting the side of the couch every now and then.

“The call is both noticeable visually and physically. For one thing,” Feitan reached up and grabbed Gon’s wrist, removing the wristband from it to show the Spider. "your number will glow. It will start to shine a dull red.” Feitan said, lightly tracing the solid 3. It began to emit a soft glow, almost pulsating red eerily. Gon suddenly winced, retracting his wrist from Feitan’s loose grip.

“The second sign of the call is a stinging pain that will only get worse until you answer it. Answering the call could be many things: going to where you are drawn, seeking out another member…As long as you are, in some way, heeding Danchou’s order, the pain will go away.” Feitan answered.

Gon watched, nearly transfixed as the number on his wrist stopped glowing. He gently touched his number waiting for any lingering pains, but felt none.

“I didn’t feel anything at all, and I thought Chrollo was the only one who could issue a call?” Killua asked, his hand clasping the back of his neck lightly tracing the raised skin of his tattoo.

“Danchou is the only one who can issue a call to all members. Every member can issue a call to one other member if they have business together. It isn’t something that can be used and treated lightly, so don’t use it often if at all possible.” Feitan began rising from the couch with Killua while Gon slid off the armrest, but all were stopped when Mito shouted from the kitchen.

“Dinner time!”

“I’d best be going…”Feitan murmured, getting quieter as he walked towards the door.

Mito popped her head out to see what was talking everyone so long, noticing Feitan near the door.

“Feitan? Aren’t you going to stay for supper?” She asked, looking concerned.

 _‘Only Aunt Mito would be concerned about a criminal not eating…’_ Gon thought with a quiet laugh.

Feitan looking vaguely uncomfortable as Mito ushered him back towards the kitchen while saying “You’re no trouble at all, dear! Stay and eat with us!”

*

“Well,” Killua began, trying not to laugh. “supper was good, but this is…” Finally Killua couldn’t hold back and started laughing at Feitan. “…This is even better!”

Feitan was clearly not in the mood for Killua’s jeers, but even the anger radiating off of him was diluted due to the fact he was wearing an old pair of Gon’s pajamas.

“If it makes you feel any better, I’ve never worn those because they were too big for me.” Gon said while shaking with laughter.

“Thanks. I feel _so_ much better.” Feitan bit out, his tone dry.

Killua looked as though he were going to die from laughter, but after getting nudged by Gon (who was also giggling), he composed himself.

“Feitan, you can sleep in my room tonight, me and Killua are gonna stay in the living room with the lights.” Gon said, already dragging Killua and a blanket out of the room. Feitan nodded his thanks, but remained awkwardly rooted to the same spot until Gon and Killua came back for pillows.

“Feitan, go ahead and take the bed! If you get cold we have spare blankets and even pillows in the closet over there.” Gon said while pointing to a door on the opposite side of the room.

“…Alright. Thank you. I will take my leave in the morning.” Feitan said, stiffly walking over to Gon’s bed.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you. Aunt Mito gets fiercely protective during the holiday season, so if she thinks you have no place to go or no one to spends the holidays with, she’ll insist that you stay.” Gon said seriously while nodding his head.

Killua nodded his head with Gon while saying “She might have you stay forever.”

Feitan shook his head with a soft noise that could have been mistaken for laughter, but he turned and climbed on to the soft bed anyways.

“I’ll think about staying. _Wăn’ān_ boys.” Feitan said, pulling the blankets up around him.

“G’night Fei.”  
“Night Feitan!” Both boys said at the same time.

As they were heading down the hallway towards the living room, Gon turned to Killua and asked “What language is he speaking?”

“He speaks Chinese. He **is** Chinese.” Killua clarified for Gon before they both entered the living room. The only lights in the room other than the Christmas lights was the light coming from the kitchen while Mito sat at the table and read.

“Good night Aunt Mito and Grandma Abe!” Gon called from the living room, spreading the biggest blanket on the floor near the tree under the window.

“Night, boys!” Both women called back, a smile clearly on their face told by the tone of their voice.

*

It was another hour before the light in the kitchen went off and both of the women went to bed, but the entire time was spent with the boys whispering stories and jokes to each other. Soft laughter could be heard from the mound of blankets every now and then, followed by more hushed words.

Gon couldn’t help but to get distracted every now and then when Killua shifted, the lights from the tree catching in his hair. The glow sent spots of dappled light over Killua’s frame, making his fair skin look near porcelain in contrast.

“Gon?”

Gon smiled cheerily at Killua who had stopped talking when he noticed Gon wasn’t listening anymore.

“Sorry Killua! It’s just-you look really nice in the lights. I got distracted. What were you saying again? Gon asked.

“I just asked you what that” Killua pointed to the top of the window frame. “was.”

Gon followed Killua’s finger, his eyes landing on a small sprig of green being held up by a tack.

“Oh! It’s mistletoe.” Gon said with a smile.

“Mistletoe?” Killua repeated while looking at the plant. “Is it important? Or is it just a holiday decoration?”

“It’s a holiday tradition. Aunt Mito always puts up some mistletoe, even if no one has use for it. Every time I would pass under the mistletoe with her or grandma Abe, they would have me give them a kiss before I could go on.” Gon said, fondly recalling those memories.

“A kiss? What for? Is it just a Whale Island thing, like how you seal a promise?” Killua asked, wondering where a tradition like that could have came from.

“I don’t really know, to be honest!” Gon admitted with a laugh. “I just know that it’s tradition!”

“Alright…I’ll probably ask her where it came from tomorrow, I just thought it was kinda weird that a plant was hanging above a window was all.”

“Ne, Killua! It’s tradition, you need to kiss me!” Gon whispered to Killua with a cheeky grin.

“What?? Idiot, it’s probably only a family thing.” Killua said with a flush.

“It’s not just a family thing, it happens in the main town with all sorts of people. I’ve even seen some sailors kissing each other under the mistletoe!” Gon said with a laugh, moving closer to Killua.

“I-Isn’t this, I dunno, a little sudden??” Killua asked, having no where to go with his back pressed against the wall.

“No, not really. At least we know each other! I’ve seen some strangers kissing under the mistletoe before.” Gon said, taking Killua’s face in his hands.

Killua’s cheeks were warm, and all Gon could think before he leaned in was _‘He has the prettiest eyes.’_

Gon gently pressed his lips against Killua’s, not missing the way Killua’s breath hitched slightly as their noses bumped awkwardly together. Gon giggled against Killua’s lips, drawing forth laughter from Killua. They parted after mere seconds while laughing quietly together.

“Tch…Gon Freeccs, it’s official. You suck at kissing.” Killua said teasingly, paying no heed to the heavy blush on his own cheeks.

Gon pouted slightly and retorted “Well, I’d like to see _you_ do any better, Mr. I’ve-never-been-on-a-date!”

“For someone who _has_ been on dates before, that was pathetic.” Killua quipped, a nervous smile taking over his face.

Before Gon could say anything back, Killua awkwardly cupped Gon’s cheeks in his hands, bringing their lips together once more, avoiding (for the most part) banging his nose against Gon’s again. It took Killua a second, but he managed to relax into the soft kiss.

Both boys couldn’t help but notice how different the other was in that moment. Gon had slightly chapped lips, rough from his habitual lip-biting when he began thinking too hard on something, and Killua had smooth lips that Gon could (and probably _would_ ) compare to velvet.

Killua couldn’t keep his eyes open for the kiss, opting instead to close them as Gon was maintaining steady eye contact with him the entire time. Gon laughed when Killua closed his eyes, and both boys parted briefly before reconnecting once again.

In that brief moment, Gon couldn’t help but be fascinated with just how pale Killua was. Gon’s hand stood out starkly in contrast against the others porcelain face, his own skin darker naturally but also sun-kissed from many days spent outside.

While Gon was focused on what the moment looked like, Killua was focusing on what it felt like. Gon’s hands were bigger than his own and warmer too; his thumb stroking the side of Killua’s face gently as a constant comforting pressure. Killua noted how Gon had calluses-probably from when he would spend hours upon hours fishing or fighting-but they weren’t bothering him in the slightest.

This was Gon, his best friend, who was equally strong and gentle at the same time; Gon, who had one arm wrapped around Killua’s shoulders pulling him closer while kissing him deeper. Killua unthinkingly let out a soft noise from the back of his throat, causing Gon to kiss him harder before letting him go.

“Alright, you win.” Gon sighed after a moment.

“ _Ha?_ What are you talking about, idiot?” Killua said, fighting against the urge to scrub at his lips.

“You are a better kisser.”

“ _…Ah._ ” Killua finally managed to get out after a bit, his cheeks growing pinker.

Both boys were breathing heavily, dark flushes covering both of their cheeks. Silence took over them both, but unlike the usual comfortable silences this one was nearly stifling in nature.

Gon grinned wickedly before he reached behind him and slammed his pillow directly into the side of Killua’s head, eliciting a yelp from him.

“You brat!” Killua growled, a large smile growing on his face as he pawed behind him for his own pillow while fending off Gon’s attacks with one hand.

*

The fight continued for a while, until it was once again interrupted by Feitan. They didn’t notice him until Killua launched his pillow at Gon’s face and missed as Gon ducked. Killua’s pillow hit Feitan dead on as he stood slightly past the hallway leading to the living room.

He didn’t look impressed as the pillow slid almost comically slowly down his face and landed with a soft plop on the floor.

“What…Did I say…About _pillow fights_?” Feitan asked slowly, his death threats going unsaid but not unheard.

“Sorry Feitan!” They both said before bowing low, hoping he would just leave without doing anything.

A loud sigh was their only response as Feitan turned and left the living room on quiet feet. Both boys glanced at each other and laughed sheepishly before agreeing that it was time to go to bed.

*

The next morning proved to be a slow one, with each person waking up at different times. By the time Killua and Gon got up, Feitan and Mito were already in the kitchen talking quietly (at least Mito was talking; Feitan was just listening while sipping on the drink she gave him). Gon and Killua stood in the doorway to the kitchen, until Killua let out a jaw cracking yawn that alerted Mito to their presence.

“Ah, boys! Glad to see you’ve joined the realm of the living.” She joked with a smile, turning with two mugs in her hand.

“Do you want some hot chocolate?” She offered, holding out the mugs to them.

 _“OhGod **Chocolate**!”_ Killua slurred in a rush, grabbing the cup from her hand with a quick thanks and a bright smile. He took a large sip of the drink, noting that it wasn’t hot enough to scorch but still pretty warm.

“Aunt Mito, I could kiss you!” Gon joked as he grabbed the warm cup from her hands.

“You _could_ kiss me, but I think you need to kiss Killua first~!” She cooed playfully, pointing upwards before turning around with a grin.

Gon and Killua felt their hearts stop, both thinking ‘ _Did she see us last night?_ ’. Only Killua saw it fit to glance up at the top of the doorway, seeing a sprig of the green leafed, white berried offending plant.

Killua felt his face flush darkly as he immediately and unthinkingly reached up…

And promptly ripped the mistletoe off of the doorway before stuffing it in his mouth.

Gon looked up seconds later, a frown adorning his face.

“Aunt Mito, what do you mean?” He asked, confusion laced in his tone.

“I hung some mistletoe up earlier! I got Feitan with it this morning and Grandma just a little while ago.” Mito said with a grin.

Killua (while still hurriedly crunching on the plant in his mouth) noticed Feitan duck his head slightly before rubbing his cheek. Killua couldn’t help but smile at how awkward his mentor really was. Not that he was any better, if the bitter taste of mistletoe was any reminder.

“Oh? That’s strange…It was there just a little while ago.” Mito said, eyes flickering around the floor to see if it had fallen. She gave a shrug and smiled at them.

“I guess you boys get away with it for now, but don’t forget: It’s tradition!” She said with a cheery smile.

Gon slowly turned to Killua, finally noticing he was chewing on something.

“Killua, is that…”

“Yes.” Killua responded, using his fingers to shove the rest of the mistletoe in his mouth.

“You do know that it’s poisonous, right?” Gon asked, amusement creeping into his voice. Killua felt his face flush darkly as he nodded, swallowing thickly and coughing a little as the plant went down.

“Take a drink to wash it down?” Gon offered, snickering a little.

Killua did just that, quickly slurping down the rest of his hot chocolate to rid himself of the taste. He saw Feitan shaking his head at him from his seat at the table before he stood up and thanked Mito for the drink.

As he passed by Killua he placed his hand on his shoulder while saying “If I had to take it from Ms. Freeccs, you can take it from Gon. It’s just a peck on the cheek, so next time deal with it.” He grumbled, stalking out of the kitchen and up the stairs to Gon’s room to change.

Killua pouted and muttered “A peck on the cheek, my ass…” before he chuckled to himself and sat at the table with Gon and Abe. 

Things might not have made too much sense from the Troupe to their own feelings, but Gon and Killua just _knew_ things were going to be fine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaand that's it for now! I hope you liked the story Squee! If not, then let me know and I can make some changes for you :)
> 
> I know you wanted to know how they got along with ALL of the troupe members, but that would have required a chapter for each member (minus Uvo and Kortopi (sorry about killing him T.T), and I was running out of time. This story ended up a lot shorter than I hoped it would be, but I hope you like it all the same :D
> 
> ((I'll just put how they get along with all of them in this AU down here:  
> Chrollo: Alright. Neither one particularly is fond of him because of how he coerced them into joining, but neither one outright hates him.
> 
> Pakunoda: They actually both really like Paku. Killua gets along better with her, and they bond over their mutual love of cats. If those two were to go to a place that had cats they would spend all day petting them.
> 
> Bonolenov: Gon likes Bonolenov more than Killua does. Gon likes to listen to him play music, but Killua really can't stand the guy.
> 
> Shalnark: Killua adores hanging out with Shalnark. They both geek out over technology, and frequently play games together. Cards Against Humanity is a game they both love playing, and Gon surprisingly kicks their asses every time he joins them for a game.
> 
> Nobunaga: Gon knows Nobunaga better, but Killua doesn't mind him. 
> 
> Feitan: Gon hated Feitan at first, but began to like him with time. After the one incident with Feitan, Killua was scared shitless of him but grew out of it later. He thinks of Feitan as an older brother, but likes him far more than he likes Illumi.
> 
> Hisoka: Hisoka is in and out of the boys lives. In this AU he doesn't leave the troupe, but he is still waiting to take a shot at attacking Chrollo. He tries helping out Gon and Killua as much as he can without it looking suspicious. He frequently takes the boys out to eat, but only if they can land a hit on him during a practice fight.
> 
> Shizuku: Killua finds it amusing how she can never remember anything at all, but it confuses Gon. Killua takes her memory loss in stride, but Gon could get stuck on something (such as an arm wrestling match) and he won't let it go until she remembers (which she never does)
> 
> Franklin: Both boys adore Franklin, but know not to get on his bad side. Franklin likes having either one (or occasionally both) sitting on his shoulder. They can chatter away to him all they'd like, but he won't respond much. He is very fond of the boys, and wouldn't immediately kill them if given the choice.
> 
> Phinks: Gon is okay with Phinks, and likes him a bit more than Killua does. Both boys are aware how he is only loyal to Chrollo, but they don't miss how often he hangs out with Feitan and Shalnark. He frequently joins in on game nights, but isn't very good at playing. More often than not, he sits aside and watches the games.
> 
> Machi: Whenever Killua gets frustrated and needs to be around someone and Gon isn't available, he goes to Machi. Machi will either sit in silence and listen to him vent, offering input when needed, or she will just keep him company if he doesn't feel like talking. Gon likes her a moderate amount, especially when she keeps Hisoka in line and prevents him from bullying them.


End file.
